Here's How Hobbies Make You More Attractive

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What is it that you love doing?

Interests and passions make you an interesting person overall. But did you know that hobbies, in particular, can directly enrich your romantic life? All through the stages of dating, from online profiles to married life, how we spend our free time influences our relationships. Let’s explore!

Quickly before we jump in, I want to make a quick case of what should be considered a “hobby.” Many, many people in today’s culture think watching Netflix or scrolling social media counts as a hobby. Though there’s nothing wrong with watching a favorite show or checking your Instagram occasionally, it most definitely should not be your default activity in free time. We all know too much screen time is bad for us, right?

What this article focuses on includes the hobbies and interests not involving screens: reading, dancing, painting, hiking, knitting, skateboarding, writing, running, collecting stamps, tightrope walking, basket weaving, etc. you get it! (If you don’t think you have any interests outside of screens, stay tuned until the very end of this article!)

Without further ado. . .

Hobbies and online dating.

Did you know that by including your hobbies on your profile, you showcase your talent AND your attitude? Reflect on how you talk about your interests online. Do you say simply “I like painting,” or did you type out an excited “I’m always eager to try another Bob Ross tutorial!” The first is a simple, bland statement. The second shows you’re actively involved, excited to learn more, and simply enjoy spending your time in an interesting way.

Another reason it’s important to share online about your hobby is to give others reasons to connect with you. If someone sees you play the violin just like they do, they’ll have something easy to share in a first message. Even if your hobbies are completely different from each other’s, you can relate simply by having a unique interest. Most people can sympathize with the bumps of learning a new skill, finding time to delve deeper into a magnum opus, or simply starting the pursuit of a lifelong dream. All of those are great starting points for messaging.

Hobbies and casual dating.

Your hobbies provide great fodder for first and second dates. Hobbies can help you pick out date locations: for instance, I love art and my date loved history, so we met for the first time at an art museum. We may have seemed like wannabe professors to anyone else, but we had a great time trading thoughts and historical trivia while we toured the galleries!

So when you’re going on first dates, jump at the chance to individualize the experience. If you’re into music, you might try a coffeeshop with a live singer. If you love animals, go to the zoo. Amateur chefs might try a teppanyaki or hibachi dinner. The options are endless!

Along with good locations, hobbies also provide solid conversation starters to ease first-date nerves. Who doesn’t love listening to someone talk about the thing they’re most passionate about? You can learn a lot about each other simply by sharing your favorite pastimes.

Hobbies in a serious relationship.

It might seem like hobbies are trivial once you’re in a serious relationship or discerning marriage. Au contraire, young grasshopper. Pursuing your passions never goes out of style! The only change is how; before this relationship, you were networking and “casting the net” to meet lots of people and have successful first dates. Now, you’ll want to use your hobbies to support your relationship with just one person. Obviously, you can still find great dating locations and have fantastic conversations with your sweetie.

On top of this, your hobbies may also start feeding your unique love languages and providing creative ways to connect. My now-hubby and I traded calligraphy and artwork through the mail during our long-distance romance. Maybe you hunt down an elusive rare button for your boyfriend’s collection, or train for a half-marathon together, or take dance classes. If you and your honey have completely different hobbies, you can simply try out each other’s pastimes. You can learn more about what makes each other tick and attempt their pursuits for yourself, too. Maybe you’ll find a fantastic joint hobby! 

Hobbies in marriage and beyond!

Sharing activities and projects obviously is a big part of marriage. Though you probably won’t have as much time for your hobbies once you start a family, it is still important to revisit them once in a while. Doing so will keep your skills fresh, revitalize your energy, and remind you of where you and your spouse began (especially if this is a hobby you do together!) Exploring interests together will only continue to enrich your romance and friendship as the years go by!

Trying new hobbies also has the added benefit of helping you develop more neural patterns, which can keep your brain more energetic and fresh. Which is especially good when you have children, who also benefit greatly from you having hobbies. You will have the chance to teach them about your interests and get them involved directly; also, by modeling your own healthy pastimes and activities, you will provide an example for how they should spend their free time. It’s a lesson they’ll take through their whole lives.

It's time to your light shine.

So you see, your hobbies not only provide charm and cheer in your free time, but also enrich your relationships in so many unforeseen ways. Maybe you’re thinking, “Man, I don’t have any interesting hobbies anymore.” Take heart and a little challenge: recall your childhood. What did you use to do and play? All of us were drawn to one thing or another as kids, which typically channel into your adult hobbies.

I guarantee you have some long-lost interests hiding in your memory. Now is a great time to revisit them! Get back into the world of hobbies, and reap the rewards in many areas of life. If nothing else, you can send an original poem, or beginner’s artwork, or a badly knitted scarf to your sweetie! In the end, it doesn’t matter if you’re skilled or talented at what you do. The point is that you have interests and spend your free time well by pursuing them. 

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