Celebrating Father’s Day As A Single Catholic: Remembering the Forgotten Fathers

That third Sunday of June is here again!

On Father’s Day, you probably make a note on your calendar to call your dad and/or send him a card. It’s a nice little nod of appreciation for all the dads out there. Most people don’t think twice, but sometimes single Catholics can feel a little forgotten, especially if they want kids but aren’t yet married yet.

But they’re not the only ones who might feel a little neglected. There are plenty of people who serve in a fatherly role but are simply unrecognized. Who are these forgotten fathers?

I remember one of my littlest brothers being about six years old. He and the other kids splayed crayons all over the floor and were making “cards” for Dad for Father’s Day. Little Edison, always inquisitive, asked Mom once again what Father’s Day meant.

“It’s a day where we celebrate all fathers,” she said. “We give them hugs and cards and tell them thank you.”

Eddie mulled on that for a while—you could practically see the gears turning in his mind. Then something must have clicked, because he grabbed another piece of paper and started another card.

“Who’s that for?” Mom asked. Edison responded with the name of our parish priest.

“We call him ‘Father’,” he said logically. The other kids thought that was a grand idea and followed suit.

So that Sunday, little hands presented misspelled, scribbly cards to our priest, who smiled in surprise and thanked each child for remembering him.

Out of the mouths of babes!

How many of us think to wish our priests happy Father’s Day?

It was one of the first things a kindergartner thought of, but it wouldn’t have crossed my mind. Priests are our spiritual fathers, after all, and oftentimes (like all fathers!) they aren’t thanked and appreciated for their hard work.

And they’re not the only ones! There are so many fathers and father figures that aren’t remembered on Father’s Day...

• Priests, clearly.

• Godfathers. There are many Godfathers who are unmarried or childless themselves—perhaps you are one of them.

• Grandfathers. Yes, grandfathers have children themselves, but perhaps they don’t get to see their children often, or their grandchildren don’t think to wish them a happy day.

• Foster fathers. My father did foster care, and we know other families who serve in this way. I truly believe foster fathers, though they don’t know how temporarily they will be in the father role, should be thanked for their stressful work.

• Single or divorced fathers with no custody. Divorced Catholics often feel frowned upon, even after annulments go through. One of the tragedies of divorce is the division of children between parents, and after the messiest cases, some parents don’t get to see their children at all.

• Nursing home residents. The elderly in nursing homes may be surrounded by their peers, but the majority are terribly lonely. Many have children who live far away, or who don’t visit often. Some may not remember how old their children are, or even their names.

• Incarcerated fathers. Many incarcerated men actually have children out there in the world somewhere. Often, they don’t see them regularly or even know them.

• Homeless fathers. The poor walking the city streets are often estranged, forgotten, or ignored by their family.

• The Big Brother program participants. Similar to foster fathers, the Big Brother program and others like it put virtuous men in the role of a father for children who don’t have one in their lives.

• Our Father in heaven, of course!

So this Father's Day, why not do something for these forgotten fathers?

You may have the time and ability to show these other fathers they are appreciated. Send flowers to your priest or a single father you know. Tap out a thoughtful text to that neighbor who does foster care, or ask the nursing home staff who could use a visit. Pray for the incarcerated, or take a moment to chat with the homeless man at the stoplight. Whatever forgotten father you might have in your life, you can be the one to remind them how valued they are, especially by their own heavenly Father.

If you don’t have much contact with anyone in these roles, you can always take some extra time with God. Do an extra devotional, thank Him for creating you and loving you, and just have a nice chat about what’s going on in your life. God wants to hear it.

So who are you going to wish a happy Father’s Day this year?