A 5 Step Guide to Post-Pandemic Dating

Well, the end is finally in sight. 

We’ve made it through almost 18 months of social distancing, masking, fear, anxiety, and ever-changing health guidelines. Maybe you endured a myriad of take-out dinners, hoarding toilet paper, working from home, and washing your homemade mask about 500 times. If so, you’re in good company!

Now that the fog is finally lifting from this COVID-19 pandemic, you’re probably ready for your “new normal.” Maybe that entails going back to the office for work. Finally stepping foot in a store. Smiling in public. The list of “new norms” is a bit endless in this phase of regrowth. 

And there is likely another activity you want to get back to: dating!

You probably weren’t fortunate enough to meet your future spouse during the pandemic (though all those covid weddings did have their perks!). If you’re like most of the single world, you surely spent less time thinking about your romantic life over the past year. But, now that things are settling down, maybe it’s time to think about dating again?! 

The question is…where to begin? Just like the confusion you felt setting foot in your grocery store for the first time in over a year, (now...where are the canned beans?) dating again is also a bit disorienting. 

Well, have no fear! Follow these five simple steps to kickstart your post-pandemic dating life:

#1: Refresh your online dating profile. 

Chances are you’ve picked up some new hobbies over the past year. Maybe you found yourself a new look or style during all those months of quarantine. Perhaps you even relocated in the pandemic, just like 9 million Americans did. 

Whatever it is, your profile needs to reflect the current *you*. Update your interests, photos, location, or anything else that could use a little spruce-up. This not only increases your chances of meeting someone new, it also gets you excited about dating again! 

#2: Refresh yourself. 

If you didn’t spend the past year getting super fit, eating healthy, praying holy hours every day, and writing a book...don’t be dismayed. The pandemic affected everyone differently, but it affected us all. Our lives—our world!—turned upside down. People lost jobs, loved ones, lives. We are all a bit changed. 

If you’re a little weary on this side of pandemia, take time to boost your confidence and your spirit. You’ll be more eager to meet someone new when you feel well. This might entail starting a workout routine, getting a fresh haircut, going back to prayer. Find your strength in the activities that make you feel like yourself. You’ll also attract others better when your self-confidence shines through. 

#3: Broaden your scope. 

Post-pandemic dating is new for everyone. When you’re ready to make the jump, it might be difficult at first to meet someone. Consider broadening your search settings online! With all the virtual technology developments this past year, a long-distance relationship might be more feasible than you think. But also, don’t just limit yourself to meeting someone online. Get out there again! Go to the bar, park, city fair or festival. As others reemerge from their own lives of solitude and get back to the social world, you might just meet someone new, right in your own backyard! 

#4: Practice, and smile! 

Let’s face it: social distancing has made all of us a bit socially awkward. We won’t leave our house without backup hand sanitizer. We can’t remember the last time we’ve eaten restaurant food inside an actual restaurant. And who even knows the etiquette of introducing yourself these days (hug, handshake, elbow bump, air-five)....?

But the weirdest and hardest part, in my opinion? We forget that we can smile now! Seriously... how many of us got so used to wearing a mask that we stopped smiling or making eye contact? If your hand is raised like mine, it’s time to stand in front of your mirror and practice that smile!

Another dating skill you can practice is just being around people. Meet up with friends you haven’t seen in a while. Walk around your neighborhood and visit with your neighbors. Go to your local farmers’ market. The more comfortable you are around others again, the less awkward your return to dating. And if you haven’t been in a restaurant or coffee shop in forever, get over that fear before your first date. There are enough first-date jitters out there, you don’t have to muddle the waters by having your first in-person dining experience too (trust me, it feels awkward the first time). 

#5: Have grace and patience. 

Remember, the entire world went through this pandemic. And it’s still not over. Everyone is “behind” in the dating world. Everyone is “behind” on their social skills. And everyone is at different levels when it comes to comfortability. You might miss the “security” of wearing your mask. That’s okay! You might not be ready to travel on a plane to meet your new long-distance match. That’s okay! 

Have patience with yourself, and with your potential dates. Before going on that first date with someone, talk to each other. Make a game plan about where you’re comfortable going—or not going. If you want some date ideas that are still a bit socially distanced, see this article. Decide on how you’ll greet each other physically (personally I think side-hugs are a safe, middle ground for a first-time meeting). Don’t grill them on their medical history or do a health-screening check at your front door (or do...if it makes you both feel more at ease!). Trust others again. Laugh at yourself. It will be awkward at first, and maybe for a while. That’s okay!

Remember that God works through everything. 

Despite this awkward phase of transition, the right doors will open for your dating life. Have a little patience and a lot of trust. Above all, place your post-pandemic dating in God’s hands. He will lead you to your vocation if you do your part, too. Now... go practice that smile!