What Makes for a Successful Date?
14
We have all imagined a perfect date at one time or another...
A sumptuous meal, the best ambiance, and the most engaging conversation you’ve ever had! But many times, the secret to being satisfied in life (at least here on earth), is not perfection but something more feasible. When the ideal only results in failed expectations, what we want is a realistic goal. The key, therefore, is not perfection but success!
Perhaps we can all start with the basic things we want to get from a date. When it’s your first date, your goal could be to know the person for the first time and to find common interests. When it’s your 50th date, you may want to spend precious time with the person you like very much. But whether it’s your first or your 50th, there are common grounds for achieving a successful date.
How do you define a successful date?
A successful date is when you’ve substantially met your expectations for the event. I say substantially because we can’t always get everything we want. Unexpected things happen and surprises fill our lives. But that doesn’t mean we have failed to get something good from the experience we’ve had.
Here are some of the signs you’ve had a successful date:
1. You enjoyed it!
What better way to measure the success of your date than the undeniable feeling that you enjoyed it? You felt happy and satisfied. You kept on smiling long after your date was over. I don’t think anyone could ever contest that.
2. You got to know each other better.
This is true whether it’s your first or your 50th date. If it’s your first, you got a better idea about the person you’ve just met. If it’s your 50th, you discovered something new about the other person. And there’s always something new to find! Weren’t you glad you didn’t miss the opportunity to see your special someone in a different light?
3. You felt supported for who you are.
The purpose of a date is not only to know the other person but to reveal more about yourself each time and feel cherished for who you are. Isn’t it wonderful to feel someone sees you and loves you just the way you are? For being the beautiful person that you are?
4. You came out fresh from the experience.
A date is also like taking a break from your usual round of activities. It’s like an oasis that refreshes you in your journey so you can feel recharged for the days ahead. If you felt energized instead of feeling drained, then you’ve had a successful date!
5. You want to do it again.
Other than your feeling of satisfaction, one of the best signs of a super successful date is that you want to do it all over again! You want more and you’re even looking forward to your next one. Doesn’t it sound like a super successful date?
Preparing For Your Super Successful Date
If you want to have this kind of date, you need to keep in mind some of the vital ingredients that would make your time worthwhile.
Here are some of the things you can do to have a fantastic date:
1. Plan carefully.
Consider the right time and place for your date. Think also of a suitable activity for you and your partner, something both of you can enjoy.
2. Listen to the other person.
By listening, you must give your undivided attention to the other person. Set aside that phone for a while and fix your gaze on the one you want to know better.
3. Be true to yourself.
Speak from the heart and don’t be afraid to show who you are. That applies even to your long-time date. Let the other person discover your passion, your favorite things, and your perspective on life.
4. Don’t forget your sense of humor.
Not everything should be serious when you date someone. Relax, be natural, laugh whenever you can, and share your wit and humor. People who can laugh together have better odds of overcoming difficult times.
5. Appreciate the positive things.
Some people use their dates as opportunities to vent out negative feelings about their work or family life. While you can definitely share your feelings, too much negativity can be toxic to your dating experience. This is especially true if you’re just getting to know each other. It feels awkward when you’re with someone who keeps on complaining and refuses to see the more positive things in life.
6. Respect each other.
Show respect in words and in action. Even if you may not always agree, give the other person the benefit of the doubt. Respect goes a long way when it comes to building a relationship. Isn’t being judged too quickly one of the most painful things you’ve ever felt when going out with people?
7. Give each other space.
Don’t be too eager and don’t try so hard. Let things flow naturally as they should. When you’re too nervous, you may talk too much. Or you may ask things that can get more personal than they should. Even if you’re dating for a while, it helps to give each other enough space to breathe.
We may take off our masks to reveal ourselves, but we can also keep a veil to protect our most sensitive spots. Isn’t it more satisfying to feel a sense of mystery with the other instead of intruding upon the privacy of our souls?
8. Show flexibility.
Plan ahead but don’t be limited by your plans. Not everything happens perfectly according to your schedule, so show some flexibility. Be open to sudden changes and adjustments.
Sometimes, it’s the unexpected moments that we remember most. They’re the opportunities given to us to know each other more.
Achieving That Super Successful Date
Having a fantastic date takes preparation, openness, and a change of attitude. It's making your time worthwhile by growing closer and creating memories together. Even if not everything happens according to your plan, you'd realize later on that even the unexpected things brought you beautiful gifts you never thought you’d have. Now that's a super successful date!
Find Your Forever.
CatholicMatch is the largest and most trusted
Catholic dating site in the world.