Five Signs You Are Dating a Good Woman
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The awkwardness of the first date is behind you, and your next date went well.
Now, you've had the conversation about your dating intentions, and you can officially say that you have a girlfriend. It’s exciting to be in a new relationship, isn’t it?!
Next, you have the difficult task ahead of you of discerning the Lord’s will and if this relationship has what it takes to be a marriage. No doubt the woman you are dating is a good woman. But the question that is certainly bouncing around in your head is, is this woman good for me?
Here are five signs that the woman you are dating is a good woman for you.
1. She brings out the best in me
The country group Diamond Rio sings a song entitled “Beautiful Mess.” The lyrics speak of a guy who is so totally engrossed in the woman that he is dating that the rest of his life is turning into a beautiful mess. “Beautiful” and “mess” are two qualities that don’t belong in the same sentence, in my opinion. If the good habits that you worked hard to acquire when you were not dating all of a sudden go the way of the dinosaur because of a girl that you are dating, then perhaps the woman you are dating isn’t right for you.
On the other hand, if the woman you are dating helps you to order your life and inspires you to form good habits, then the woman you are dating is a good woman for you.
2. She helps me grow in holiness
Holiness is when you align your will with God’s will, and then live it out!
So ask yourself: Is the woman I am dating inspiring me and helping me to grow closer to God? Do you pray together? Do you attend Mass together? Do you study the Scriptures together or talk about God together? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then you are dating a good woman!
3. She inspires me to sacrifice
Any married couple will tell you that marriage is synonymous with sacrifice. When you are dating you need to start to develop that desire and ability to put your woman’s needs and desires before your own. Sacrifice for your beloved. If you find yourself starting to change your life in order to make her life better, this is a good sign.
Perhaps you have started paying off debt to prepare for a better future for you both, instead of spending your money on fun things. Perhaps dating her is giving you the push to stop masturbating so that your sex life will better and you can stay in the state of grace. Perhaps you have to give up sleep in order to talk with her when she is done with work. All of these things will help you in your future marriage. You will need to sacrifice your time, money, and your sex drive in order to have a successful marriage. Ultimately, if you find yourself sacrificing for your woman in ways that you have never done before, you have found a good woman to date.
4. She makes me laugh
This is a quality that you often hear women attribute to the men they are dating, “he makes me laugh.” But I think the quality can right be applied to women too.
While marriage is a blessed and joyous state, sometimes life stinks and can really get you down. The big deal at work can fall through, or your boss might be giving you a real heard time. Maybe the car is broken, or the roof on the house needs to be repaired. Life will throw a curveball at you, and you will need a good woman to help you laugh at life’s struggles. If the woman you are dating can make you laugh, she is a keeper!
5. I trust her
Do you feel safe enough with the woman you are dating to reveal your heart to her? In other words, are willing to be vulnerable with her? In my opinion, trust in a relationship is synonymous with vulnerability. When you trust your girlfriend or spouse, you, in essence, feel safe enough that you reveal to her the very center of who you are: your hopes and dreams, your fears, your shortcomings, etc. By revealing the very core of your own self, you make yourself vulnerable to be hurt. The more you love her, the more you trust her. The more you trust her, the deeper is her capacity to hurt you; therefore you really need to trust her.
When you are dating there are definite stages to vulnerability. Go read my post on those different stages, knowing that when you hit stage number three, you are dating a really good woman.
Trying to find the right woman for you is difficult and takes much prayer and discernment. If you look for these five signs, at the very least, you have found a good woman. Chances are, the woman you are dating has many more good qualities!
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