It's About the Journey—What NASA and Marriage Prep Have In Common

After five years of work, watchfulness and waiting, NASA’s Juno spacecraft has finally closed in on its destination: Jupiter. And the people in charge of the mission couldn’t be happier. Pictures and stories show the engineers jumping for joy, clapping their hands and acting like a bunch of kids on a playground because they had accomplished a life-long dream; a man-made rocket orbiting the king of the solar system planets. Way to go team NASA!

But is this the “final” destination for this mission? No—it is not. Actually, it is just a transitional point in the journey of the Juno probe; one that changed the trajectory from traveling in a straight line to orbiting.Without doubt, this is an amazing accomplishment. But there is a lot of work that still needs to be done.

The destination is not the end

The NASA team certainly understands that. Within hours of the news that Juno was in orbit, they changed gears and began gathering data from the red planet. I’m no space geek, but, it seems obvious that nothing really ended for this team. They just entered the next phase of the mission.

Consider this: the current phase of the Juno mission is only possible because several well-crafted stages preceded it. Remotely, there was development and construction of the probe. Proximately, there was the launch and the flight. And now, there is the immediate phase of orbiting and data gathering. Clearly, this mission has been successful because more time and attention is given to the full journey rather than to this point in the mission.

There are great similarities between the Juno mission and what we do in marriage ministry. Successful marriage preparation is much more than a wedding destination. It is a journey through a set of stages that build upon themselves. Successful marriage prep includes formation and development, a trajectory, an orbit and finally a landing. If you delete, rush or overlook any of these components, you put the mission at risk of failure.

Who do we help?

Right now, there are many single Catholics  who sense a call to be married and are looking to the Catholic Church for assistance. Some need help understanding sacramental marriage. Others need direction on how to date with a purpose towards marriage. Then there are those who need support during the waiting game of meeting someone. What do we have to offer them at each stage of their journey?

Are you scratching your head right now and thinking, “Wait a minute; are you suggesting that part of marriage preparation is outreach to single Catholics who want to get married but are having troubles finding the right person?” Yes—that is exactly what I am suggesting.

With that said, let me also tell you what I am NOT suggesting; that you create another “to do” item to your already overloaded marriage ministry plate. The goal here is not to increase your work load but to reframe it. The idea is to discover creative ways to share God’s plan for marriage and family life.

Reframing your mission

Here are a few possible ways to start rethinking marriage ministry.

1. Expand your understanding of marriage ministry. See it as a journey rather than a destination. It is very easy to get caught in the headset that marriage ministry starts with the engagement and ends with the marriage rite. This just doesn’t jibe with Catholic teaching at all. In reality, one’s understanding of marriage begins with childhood experiences and continues past the wedding day.

2. Learn more about the stages or periods of marriage preparation. Church documents tell us that there are three distinct stages in marriage preparation; remote, proximate and immediate. Though these stages are not rigidly defined, each one is a necessary step in the journey towards a lifelong, sacramental union.

3. Spread the good news on marriage. Understanding the broader context of marriage ministry logically leads to a repackaging of the principal theological and liturgical content that couples need to know. Not everything needs to be saved for those who are engaged. In fact, it might be better if some of the information that has been reserved for engaged retreats is provided in advance. For instance, helping people learn what it means to be selfless or how to solve a conflict might be better suited for eligible single Catholics. Sharing it earlier might help them become more marriage ready and find their perfect Catholic match.

Jumping for joy

The NASA space team has advanced space exploration step by step. This model has worked well for them and is worthy of imitation. Rethinking our marriage mission as a series of phases will likely achieve a better journey for all that we serve. In fact, it may result in launching more people on the heavenly marriage journey that God intends.

I know the Juno mission is a great accomplishment. But, imagine how amazing it would be for marriage ministers across the U.S. to find themselves jumping for joy, clapping their hands and acting like a bunch of kids on a playground five years from now because so many people were entering into sacramental marriage. That would be extraordinary.