Catholic and Single? You Need To Do This!

The first step to finding your future spouse is discerning whether or not the vocation of marriage is right for you.

But how do you do it?

What is discernment, and why do it?

In the Church, we often speak about discernment and its importance. However, it seems we often neglect to discuss why we should discern, or how we should do it. Prayer is, of course, a major component in discernment, but there has got to be more to it than that!

Discernment is a lifelong journey of obtaining spiritual guidance and understanding of God’s will through purposeful prayer, meditation, and constant reevaluation of our desires, actions, and outcomes. Discernment is one of the most important actions we must take before we can be fully prepared to make a lifelong commitment such as marriage. Knowing yourself—your strengths, weaknesses, desires, and goals—gives you excellent leverage in the dating market. 

A great way to practice discernment is through a total Consecration of yourself to Jesus through Mary. When you dedicate your life to a higher purpose, you are “happier, more contented, enjoy richer relationships and are more resilient in the face of adversity than those who haven't,” according to Forbes Magazine. This is exactly what total Consecration to Jesus is!

Consecration to Jesus through Mary will benefit your love life.

St. Louis Marie de Montfort, a French Catholic priest ordained in the year 1700, preached that the best way to become one with Jesus Christ was to reflect on and emulate the life of the Virgin Mary, who gave herself wholly to God from birth until death. Consecration to Jesus through Mary will help you to fully embrace your spirituality and serve the Lord beautifully throughout your life.

St. Louis Marie de Montfort’s basic premise was that Jesus came into the world through Mary, so for us to get to Jesus, we should go through Mary. His book, True Devotion to the Blessed Virgin has become a guideline for Catholics on Marian Devotion and total Consecration to Jesus.

But what does total Consecration have to do with finding a spouse? Consecration to Jesus Christ brings us closer to God and His will than ever before. If God’s will is for us to be married, then the easiest way to discover this path is through total Consecration to Him.

First, finding out more about Jesus—His life, His ministry, His passion, death for our sins, and miraculous resurrection—brings us closer to Him. The more we wonder about Jesus and answer His call to follow Him, the more we can be like Him. Our desire for Christ and His knowledge brings us into discipleship with Him. Through discipleship, we have the opportunity to walk with Christ; to pick up His cross and go with Him. We begin to live like Christ and preach the message of love that He left for us.

This devotion deepens your vocation.

At this point, we are believers in Christ, and so we reap all the benefits that His love brings to us: peace, joy, and the ability to begin to know the meaning of life. All of these things aid us in our journey of discerning marriage, engaging in a dating relationship, and making the decision to commit ourselves to another for life through marriage.

Discipleship, when nurtured, matures into an Apostolic mission. For some, discipleship to Jesus may lead them to a religious vocation. Others will be called to the vocation of marriage. Wherever your path of discernment takes you, maintaining closeness with Jesus through prayer and meditation will make the path of your decision clearer. 

If you are already wed, your marriage can also benefit from total Consecration to Jesus Christ. When you do this together with your spouse, you will see that putting a higher power at the center of your relationship is incredibly fulfilling.

Inviting Jesus into your marriage takes the pressure off of each spouse to be perfect to each other because you come to know that the only path to complete fulfillment is through Jesus Christ. Consecration of your marriage to Jesus also gives you a shared goal as a couple to fulfill God’s Word through your thoughts, actions, and ministry.

How Do I Consecrate Myself to Jesus Through Mary?

33 Days to Morning Glory by Fr. Michael Gaitley, MIC, a book you have probably seen in the lobby of your local church or flipped through at a Bible study meeting, is an excellent resource for anyone looking to consecrate themselves to Jesus through Mary. The book is available as a PDF for free online. The book breaks down the prayers and meditations necessary for a Total Consecration in 33 steps. 

The process requires 10-15 minutes per day of prayer and reflection. The purpose of the Consecration is “to free ourselves from the spirit of the world” and become one with Christ, but also provides numerous benefits for your personal, spiritual, and dating life.