Reena’s passion for football caught Jim’s attention, but it took a little encouragement before Jim could make his move. “I was active in the sports forum,” 36-year-old Reena recalled. “That was where he first noticed me. It was probably May 2013 when I got my multiple profile views from him and he liked all my pictures, but never even sent me an emotigram.”
Jim was impressed by her profile. The fact she liked football might have been what caught his attention, but deeper virtues were what persuaded him to follow, what he described as his standard approach in liking her pictures. “When I saw Reena’s profile, I was impressed with her fidelity to the Church and pride in America,” he said.
It was late that month, after more profile views and photo liking that she sent him a short note. Properly encouraged, Jim took over and they began online communication.
There was a considerable distance gap to deal with—Reena lived in northern California, while 37-year-old Jim is in Pittsburgh. Consequently, even though they were becoming friends, neither was counting on anything more.
But even though Jim was skeptical, he was open to the possibility. He was getting frustrated with his CatholicMatch experience, mainly due to the lack of response from local prospects. “Messages did not come easy to me,” he said, recounting the numerous rejections by silence. “When I received few responses from local women, I started to consider a long-distance relationship more seriously.”
In mid-July though, they began talking on the phone and decided that Jim would make a visit west. In September 2013, they met in person for the first time.
The mere willingness of Jim to fly across the country to meet Reena touched her, and she found his sincerity and effort attractive. No less attractive was his commitment to the Catholic Church, particularly regarding the teachings on marriage and pro-life issues.
The trip went well and showed them both that something special was possible. “Reena impressed me with her patience and her sense of humor,” Jim recalled. “We were able to schedule several fun activities into a short trip.” The activities included an introduction to her family, something that was later reciprocated back east.
The emphasis on finding a good Catholic man had not always been the case for Reena. “I was in a relationship for four years,” she recalled. “It was a time in my life where I lagged in my faith. That relationship taught me what love is not supposed to be.” While still in the relationship, she began growing in her faith and it marked the end. “God found a way to break us up,” she said.
Reena renewed her commitment to the sacramental life, grew in her faith, but she didn’t take a break from dating. “I plowed in, even signed up for CatholicMatch thinking I can meet a nice Catholic guy. I met a few but nothing came of it.” Through that process, she learned she was looking for God and took a break from dating—or seeking to date—to discern if the religious life was for her.
“My discernment time was a wonderful experience,” she recalled. “I have come to know who I really am—a daughter of the King.” When she decided it was God’s plan for her to return to the dating world, she had a fresh perspective. “I learned again that it was God who I seek.” No longer would she make finding romance and true love a false idol. And she was secure in the knowledge that if she wasn’t going to meet anyone, God would grant her contentedness with being single.
Jim had his own difficult journey to navigate. He experienced “limited success” in dating during college, and during his twenties, a series of family, health and career issues made a relationship impractical. One women he did meet ended things quickly, after two dates. Jim, like Reena, sees the hand of God in the breakup. “He was preserving my availability for Reena,” Jim said.
It was 2012 that Jim’s dating journey brought him to CatholicMatch. He had already been on two other online dating sites, and knew he liked the general concept. “My shyness and limited information had prevented me from asking women out,” he admitted. “A decent CatholicMatch profile contains a lot of relevant information, so I was generally more comfortable pursuing relationships with online matchmaking.”
Shortly after Reena rejoined CatholicMatch, she went to Adoration and asked for the qualities that God wanted her to find in a husband. She wrote down the results. “I came across that list again recently,” she said. “It gave me chills when I read it because it described the things I saw in Jim and I saw the date that I wrote it—it was shortly after when Jim viewed my profile and liked all my photos.”
And what were those qualities? “He is very sweet and is very mindful of me,” Reena said. “He does not have any addictions. Jim is a decent, responsible and intelligent guy. (And) his glasses can’t hide his beautiful blue eyes.”
Jim and Reena enjoy traveling together and praying the Rosary together. They have melded both of those shared commitments in a recent journey to Washington D.C. for the March For Life. They’ve traveled around the United States together, including trips back and forth to meet each other’s families.
The struggle to find God’s will—including the long-distance relationship, which Reena admitted does take patience and calls for utilizing modern technology (Skype, etc)—was worth it. Jim and Reena will be married in January 2015.
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