"The Dating Project" Documentary Validates All of Your Dating Frustrations
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"Connecting with a man that shares the same values as me kind of feels like a needle in a haystack," laments Rasheeda, 30, from New York City.
Shanzi; Photo Credit: "The Dating Project"
Rasheeda is one of the stars of a fascinating documentary, produced by Paulist Productions, called The Dating Project, which has a one-day nationwide release in theaters on April 17th, 2018.
Along with Rasheeda, the film follows two Boston College freshmen, Shanzi and Matt; Cecilia, 25, from Chicago; and Chris from Los Angeles—a 40-something guy with commitment issues. Each of them shares their dating struggles and relationship hopes in a way that will captivate audiences either because they are living with these same frustrations or because they have children and grandchildren who are lonely.
What is a date? Do you know? Does anyone?
What's made clear throughout this well-made and entertaining documentary is that we have more than one generation of young adults who don't know what a date is, if they're on a date, or in a dating relationship. We also have young people who are deathly afraid of rejection.
Matt; Photo Credit: "The Dating Project"
It's heartbreaking to discover that, ironically, young adults feel that a hookup—in varies states of undress—is much easier than dating because dating exposes oneself.
Shanzi, 18, drives home a key point when she says, "I don't feel that a lot of people from my generation know what our end goal is."
If you've been "dating" a long time, this movie might be a wake-up call.
The Dating Project chose a good cross-section of people to interview for this documentary. Each of the people featured are well-spoken, likable, and relatable. They offer valuable insight—though not always self-aware insight—into what's wrong with today's hookup culture and how dating has become a lost art.
I think this film can serve as a wakeup call to young people that they don't want to end up like 40-something Chris who can't commit because he always thinks there's someone better around the corner—until there is no more corner. Even Chris doesn't want to end up like Chris.
It's also a call to the Church that we need to do something to remedy the number of lonely young—and not so young—single adults suffering in the pews and outside the Church. I am proud to say that The CatholicMatch Institute and CatholicMatch have been a leader on this front.
Are you willing to take on a dating assignment?
Professor Kerry Cronin; Photo Credit: "The Dating Project"
Professor Kerry Cronin has also been actively working to revive a dating culture. A Catholic and a Faculty Fellow in Boston College's Center for Student Formation, Professor Kerry Cronin, who also appears in The Dating Project, is reviving the traditional dating script with her students.
In the film, she discusses some of the reasons behind the current dating crisis, the prevailing hookup culture, and how she's teaching students to date with her "dating assignment."
The rules of the assignment are:
One of the most interesting parts of the documentary is the scene where Professor Cronin's presents her "dating assignment" to her students. Pointing to a whiteboard, she lays out the rules to her assignment that include:
Chris; Photo Credit: "The Dating Project"
1. Ask someone out in person.
2. Declare it's a date to avoid "accidate".
3. Pay for the date, which should cost no more than $10.
4. Date should last no longer than 90 minutes.
5. Be sex, drug, and alcohol-free.
Piece of cake assignment, right? No! Professor Cronin says students find this extremely difficult. Asking someone out is too much of a risk.
People want to date each other! So don't pretend you aren't interested.
In this day and age, you couldn't talk about dating without addressing online dating sites and apps. The Dating Project shines a pretty favorable light on internet dating, which demonstrates that people are still interested in dating.
"A lot of people are just trying to work around the problem of the lack of the dating culture in the United States," Cronin said in an interview I did with her for Catholic Digest. "The great thing is that when people go on dating apps and sites, they realize that they don’t have to pretend that they’re not interested."
I totally recommend this movie!
I can't say enough good about The Dating Project; I think it offers validation and hope to young people because it lets them know that they are not alone in their frustration and confusion when it comes to dating. It also gives older generations a glimpse of understanding of what difficulties our younger adults face when it comes to ultimately finding a spouse.
Check out The Dating Project trailer below:
https://vimeo.com/201465998
Don't miss it because there's only one showing on April 17th.
Complete the dating assignment and ready for more?
If you're intrigued by Professor Cronin's "dating assignment," then check out the CatholicMatch Institute's latest endeavor The Ultimate Guide to Purposeful Dating. It's a video course for Catholics who want to get married. This hour-and-a-half, self-paced video course gives you the tools to date more effectively and to become more date-able. Who doesn't want that? I think it's fair to say that everyone needs a pep talk on why you shouldn't over-romanticize the dating process, which the course covers. It also deals with ways to improve yourself, how to cope with rejection, how to prepare yourself for the vocation of marriage, and it addresses divorced Catholics, plus much more.
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