It's Time To Shut Up And Let It Go

Most days seem long and draining when you work in marriage ministry. The good news, there is so much to do that we can't work our self out of the job. The bad news, there is so much to do that we can't work our self out of the job. Talk about a two-edged sword.

When a week is stressful, I usually engage in activities that distract my thinking in hopes that my mind will forget all the issues that surfaced at work. That was my plan a few weeks back. After closing down the office, I decided to go to the grocery store to pick up a few items. I got in the car and turned on the radio hoping that the reporter's voice might pull me out of my thoughts. But it didn't. I felt more frazzled as the reporter reviewed the day's national news. My tension was going up not down.

Shopping made it worse

When I entered the store, I prayed that the simple act of shopping would help me decompress like it normally does. But, for some reason, the sounds coming from the greeter, the background music, and those end cap machines that blare sales pitches at you when you walk by made my head pound. There was no escaping the noise—noise—NOISE! (If you have ever watched the Grinch Who Stole Christmas, you can imagine what my face must have looked like.)

My tension continued to mount.

Everything and everyone in the store seemed to increase my irritability. I thought to myself, "Retail therapy is not working! It's just making me more anxious. What can I possibly do to set myself right? Where can I dump my stress and move on?"

I received the answer to my question on the drive back to the house. You see, the route home takes me within a couple of blocks of our parish. The mere site of the building's sloped roof with the bell tower had a calming effect. It beckoned me to alter my path and turn into the church's parking lot. As I turned off the ignition, my tension dropped again. A cleansing breath filled me as I opened the door to the church.

The answer

Silence. The Church was filled with silence and the warming presence of Jesus.

I blessed myself, genuflected and sat in the pew. My shoulders dropped and my back relaxed in a matter of minutes. I closed my eyes and quickly realized that the burdens of the week were being lifted from me. They were not being fixed or forgotten, solved or softened. They were being temporarily transferred to the divine healer who would carry them for me over the weekend.

It only took five to ten minutes of silence in the presence of Jesus to shake off the week's problems.  The silent encounter with my Creator put the week into perspective and reminded me that God heals the wounds of people. All I do is collect them and bring them to him.

The silence allowed me to reflect on all that had happened over the past five days, the engaged couple who wanted an exemption from the pre-marriage inventory, the wife who called asking for a marriage counselor, the priest who wanted to know why he needed to address cohabitation with engaged couples, the parent who visited to say that her son had filed for divorce—again... The week's issues became surmountable and the anxiety diminished as the minutes ticked by.

That silence is worth 1,000 words

It is a good reminder to all of us who work in marriage ministry that God—Father, Son, Holy Spirit—wants us to bring the woes of the world to Him. In fact, he wants us to remember:

• God is the divine healer—we are not.
• He wants us to take time alone with him, in his silence.
• Spending time in God's silence refreshes the soul and provides us better perspective.
• A Godly perspective equips us to go back into ministry and re-engage.

It struck me as I walked out of Church that God's ways are simply contrary to the world's ways. To be more present to others requires silence. To be more engaged with people demands that we disengage into silence. Renewal is more easily achieved in silence not in earthly distractions.

The radio remained off on the way home. It was such a pleasant drive back to the house.