Can Men and Women Be Just Friends?

Friendships are important. They can make us happy and bring us closer to God.

However, friendship with the opposite sex can be a slippery slope; especially if you are already in a committed relationship. While it may seem harmless at first, it can lead to dangerous and potentially devastating consequences.

Emotional Attachment

When you have a close friendship with someone of the opposite sex, it is natural to develop an emotional attachment to that person. This attachment can be innocent at first, but, if it continues to grow, it can become inappropriate dependence on the other. This emotional reliance is an issue if you are in a relationship, and it may even threaten the bond of trust between you and your partner. Even if you aren't in a relationship, friends of the opposite sex (whom you don't plan on dating) can be an obstacle in any future relationships. It is difficult to establish and maintain healthy boundaries in friendships between men and women, and the matter is even more complicated when feelings are involved.

Time and Attention

Just like any other relationship, close friendships require time and attention. When you have a close friendship with someone of the opposite sex, it can take away from the time and attention that you should be devoting to the person you are dating or seeking to pursue. However, if you are not interested in dating right now, that might be perfectly okay.

Be aware that when you are interested in someone, they may be confused as to why you spend so much time with a member of the opposite sex. This is understandable. Be prepared to dial this friendship back if your significant other is concerned.

Physical Attraction

Physical attraction is a natural and normal part of human relationships. It is important to consider this can happen when you have a close friendship with someone of the opposite sex. When physical attraction enters the picture, it can become an issue if you are not prepared to deal with it.

If you find yourself attracted to your friend, address it. If the feeling is mutual, just date. Don’t be afraid you’re going to ruin the friendship. The friendship could be the very thing that makes the relationship work.

Jealousy and Insecurity

When you have a close friendship with someone of the opposite sex, jealousy, and insecurity often enter the picture on both sides. Your partner may become jealous of the time and attention you give to your friend, and you might be jealous of your friend's significant other.

Your partner may misinterpret your intentions with your friend, and this can lead to arguments and conflict. You will have to split your time and attention, and you or your friend may cross boundaries or fail to establish them in the first place. You should always honor your partner first, and you ought to avoid giving him/her grounds for questions or distrusting you. Even if your intentions are perfectly pure, your actions can be hurtful, and it can lead to suspicion and insecurity in your relationship.

Temptation

Temptation is the biggest thing to consider here. Emotional connections can lead to physical attraction. This means you may be tempted to cross a boundary with your friend. If you are not careful, it is easy to become emotionally or physically involved with your friend.

If you do this before you’ve established a mutual desire to date, it causes confusion, resentment, and can even lead to the end of the friendship.

Conclusion

Having a close friend of the opposite sex is not completely forbidden, even if you are dating someone else. However, it is important not to deny the reality that romantic feelings can develop.

Keeping the above things in mind, note that it is entirely possible to have a perfectly innocent, platonic, and appropriate friendship with someone of the opposite sex. But boundaries and prudence are everything; especially for the sake of protecting your future dating relationships. Don't be afraid to make friends, but always keep your partner in mind, and listen to your conscience in uncertain situations!