The Charlie Hebdo Rosary And Your Divorce

Back in January 2002, I was at a conference for the Catholic Radio Association in Miami. This was just 4 months after the devastating terror attacks on the World Trade Center on September 11th. One of the guest speakers—I don't remember his name—was a survivor of the attack. Several of his relatives were firefighters who lost their lives that day.

And as he recounted his very tragic and emotional story, he said something I will never forget... He said, "On September 11th, all Americans became New Yorkers, and all the rest of the world became Americans."

He couldn’t have been more correct. On that day, the whole world was with us in our shock and horror. The whole world cried with us. The whole world was filled with compassion for the victims of that attack and showed their solidarity in whatever way they could: candlelight memorials, flowers and images on fences, etc.

We've seen this sort of compassionate, unified attitude happen many times since that day with other tragedies that have happened. For example, Je suis Charlie became a popular phrase after the Charlie Hebdo shootings in France. It means "I am Charlie" which conveys the sentiment "I stand with you. I'm with you."

A Break In The Solidarity Chain

Divorced Catholics, go through their own personal September 11th. The divorce experience is devastating on so many levels, but unfortunately, there isn’t much uniting in compassion for their suffering. So often, they are shunned as sinful failures. Don't get me wrong, those who have abandoned their marriages and families for selfish reasons have committed grave offenses. But there are plenty of divorced Catholics who are divorced against their will and are left to suffer the consequences of their spouse's terrible choice, oftentimes completely alone.

Take for example the fact that people often equate divorce with the death of a spouse, but do not treat those situations the same. When someone dies, the surviving spouse is bombarded with attention in the form of flowers, sympathy cards, meals, visits, etc. This is all good, and it should be done. But when someone loses a spouse through divorce, none of that happens, in fact, people tend to avoid that person instead of showing compassion or sympathy.

I can’t say it often enough: Showing compassion to someone who is suffering because of divorce does not mean you condone divorce. It means you help them carry their cross—an act that helps to keep them in their faith instead of leaving it.

But, for those who are divorced and feeling disconnected, God has not left you, in fact, he is closer to you now, than ever. And I know a great way you can understand how that is...

The Rosary: Full Of Charlie Hebdo Moments

If you’re divorced and feeling alienated, one of the best things you can do to be reminded of God’s love for you is by meditating on the mysteries of the rosary. The rosary is full of “Charlie Hebdo” moments.

In contemplating Jesus’ life as we do in the mysteries of the rosary, we can hear God saying to us, “I am with you,” and we see him demonstrating this through his actions. If you consider the fact that the Almighty Creator of the universe came down from heaven and became a tiny, helpless baby...that's him saying, "I'm with you.

When he was baptized in the Jordan River, he wasn't getting baptized because he needed to be cleansed of sin, because he was sinless. When he stood there and let John the Baptist poor the water over him, he was showing us, "I'm with you."

When he dragged that heavy cross through the streets on his way to Calvary, he was showing us, "I am with you. And who can not help but be convinced of his solidarity with us in suffering when you contemplate Jesus on the cross crying out, “My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?”

Jesus is with you in your suffering. He is the only one who not only has seen every detail of what you’ve been through. He knows what happened first hand. He knows what is in your heart. He knows the pain you carry with you every day. He sees how hard you try to be faithful and do the right thing.

In Romans 8:28, St. Paul assures us that if we are faithful to God and love him, he will take our circumstances, no matter how bleak and depressing they might seem and use them for our good, he will make something good happen out of all this.

So, trust in God and trust that he will take care of you. Stay close to the sacraments, come to Mass as often as possible, and pray the rosary so you have that daily reminder of God’s love for you.