How to Live the Virtue of Hope as a Single Person
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A little while ago my friend asked me "What virtue do you think you're the weakest in?" That's not a question you get asked every day, so I spent some time uncomfortably pondering the question.
I thought about the saying, “faith, hope and love...and the greatest of these is love,” and it became clear to me that my greatest area for growth was the virtue of hope.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church reads,
“The virtue of hope responds to the aspiration to happiness which God has placed in the heart of every man...it keeps man from discouragement; it sustains him during times of abandonment; it opens up his heart in expectation...
Buoyed up by hope, he is preserved from selfishness and led to the happiness that flows from charity.”
I love that last line; “buoyed up by hope.” Hope keeps us afloat. It is the theological virtue pointing to an eternity with Jesus in Heaven. As I began to ponder who might be a model of this virtue, I thought of a good friend. Currently single, she lives a life filled with hope. Her happiness comes from a heart filled with expectation, and her joy “flows from charity.” Her smaller hopes serve her ultimate hope of Heaven.
Let me explain.
This friend of mine, Katie, has shown me what it looks like to hope, to live life in a way that naturally brings others into this same cheerfulness and delight of life. How does she does this?
In a variety of ways:
She sets goals; academically, spiritually and recreationally, and she also focuses on others, by taking an intentional look at her life and determining ways that she can best use her gifts to serve others. Katie then exercises leadership by actively using her gifts and directing them towards giving life to others.
- In her work as a teacher, she helps to shape the mind and character of over twenty children in her classroom every year. Katie challenges her students to strive for excellence; and she holds herself to the same standard.
- When Katie found out there was an opportunity to learn Latin at a local parish, she signed up and committed to devoting time to memorization throughout the week and spent hours writing flashcards. She has hope for keeping language alive and its role in history.
- When she saw an opportunity to grow in greater knowledge of her faith, she signed up to audit an evening class in Catholic Studies. She has hope that God will draw her into relationship more deeply.
- When she found the parish she wanted to belong to, she joined the parish and immediately looked for ways she could both volunteer and get involved in the life of the parish. She volunteered and committed to a year of training to be a docent at her Cathedral parish so that she could provide tours for visitors, and she also signed up for the parish Bible Study. She has hope that her parish can be a witness, that she can be a tool in conversion and that her parish will be a community which helps her stay the course on the path of holiness.
- She shows her vigor for life by prioritizing time to do the things she loves like water coloring and calligraphy. She aims for excellence by mixing color after color to find the perfect shade to fill in a flower petal and by rewriting phrase after phrase with her calligraphy pens. She does this because she has hope that it matters. She has hope that by water coloring, she can create a beautiful image, which will then lead another to Goodness. She calligraphies quotations because she has hope that it can be the message that helps another find Truth and Beauty in their life.
I have not yet even begun to explain how Katie gives hope to others in her direct service to them.
She helps her married friends...
I have lost count of all of the times she has generously bought groceries and offered hours of her time to cook a meal for a friend who has recently delivered a new little baby into the world. She has hope for new life.
When their babies grow a little older, she offers her nights and weekends to give their mom and dad a date night or just an afternoon off by babysitting for a few hours. She has hope in the power of connection and love.
And her friends who are far away
For the friends and family who are a little too far away to run a meal to or stop in for a few hours, she spends her extra time writing letters and putting together creatively curated care-packages to send them. She has hope for sustained friendships and knows the importance of expressing her love for others.
Now that a few years have passed since I recognized my deficiency in the virtue of hope, I am grateful to say that my own hope has grown.
Observing and learning from Katie’s example has shown me how hope is a major player in her life. If it were not for her hope, she would not have any reason to pursue the things that she does. My heart is now filled with a greater anticipation and “expectation” of things eternal. By the grace of God I’m holding on to the buoy, and it’s been a fun ride!
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