"Do you think if we had met 40 years ago, we would have hit it off?" Duffy asked her husband Dennis.
They met on CatholicMatch in 2014. She was 57 and going through a nullification process: her previous marriage had a "lack of form." Dennis, a 59-year-old widower, had been on CatholicMatch for six months (she was on only three) when they met. They were so ideal for each other, it was hard to imagine life without one another.
Although it was tempting to dismiss their pasts, Dennis answered Duffy's question, "God was saving our finding each other for now, when we needed each other." They were meant to find each other at the perfect time.
Once They Found Each Other, Their Love Was Immediate!
Previously, Dennis tried other dating websites, finding them discouraging. Most women he encountered were dishonest and insincere. CatholicMatch seemed like a breath of fresh air. He could connect with women with integrity and with his priorities of Faith and character at the forefront.
Duffy never tried another dating website. Though she was lonely and wanted to be in a relationship, she did not have time between her full-time job and caring for her aging mother to meet new people. She knew a co-worker who had found his spouse through CatholicMatch; she decided to give it a try. She fully trusted that CatholicMatch was the best place for her to find that special someone.
One day in July 2014, Duffy skimmed profiles with her sister for fun. When Duffy saw Dennis's picture, she looked past, but her sister insisted she take a closer look. Duffy was grateful that she did.
She says, "I'm an art teacher, and I appreciated his writing in his profile."
Dennis seemed to be insightful and articulate - she decided to contact him right away. When Dennis received her message, he viewed her profile and thought, 'Wow!' They immediately hit it off.
A few weeks later, they met for breakfast in a quaint little town in New Jersey, full of antique shops and art.
"We had our first kiss four seconds after our eyes met," Dennis said.
They spent the entire day together, which included visiting Duffy's mother in the nursing home.
"She has dementia, but my mom still loved him. He could make her laugh," Duffy recounted. Their day together was completely happy, and Dennis didn't get back to his home in Pennsylvania until midnight.
They lived an hour apart, but Dennis felt the traveling was worth getting to know Duffy better. The two met every weekend for months. Dennis, who is a carpenter, even designed and rebuilt Duffy's deck for her.
Being grandparents, they enjoyed spending time with their families. They went on hikes, roamed museums, explored in kayaks, and indulged in music. Dennis was active in the Celtic Fests at Bethlehem, PA for years, and Duffy happily joined him in his passion. The more time they spent together, the more they wanted to be together.
Overcoming Obstacles...
Duffy's three children encouraged her to seek a nullification not long after her divorce. They wanted her to be in a good place when the time came for her to look for another relationship.
The nullification process took a year, and Duffy sensed God's grace through it all. A kind priest mentored her and her siblings came to her side as witnesses.
Despite this, her children were worried when she and Dennis found each other. It would take time for them to adjust to their mother's new relationship.
About six months into their relationship, when Duffy received the official nullification, she and Dennis began discussing marriage. Dennis was widowed, but he was a deacon. It was a difficult decision to leave the diaconate, and he struggled with the choice before pursuing any relationships.
"Instead of a God-shaped hole, I had a woman-shaped hole in my heart," Dennis said. Eventually, he felt that God would rather he left the call of being a deacon than to be miserable.
He couldn't start the process of being laicized until Duffy's nullification was complete. The couple had to wait nearly another year before they could marry in the Church. "We wanted the Sacrament of Marriage, not just to live together," Duffy emphasized. Once the Pope signed the official statement that Dennis was once again laity, they were able to wed.
Happily Ever After!
Dennis and Duffy love being husband and wife. When they talk about how they met, they reiterate the importance of the profiles and looking beyond the pictures on CatholicMatch. Being able to see how much they had in common, from music to traveling, before making contact is a key to how well they communicated during their first messages to one another.
"She was the first woman I had met in 40 years that liked jazz! I took that as a sign," Dennis says.
From that first sign to their wedding to the present, things fell into place for Dennis and Duffy.
Thanks to God's timing, they look forward to spending the rest of their lives together.
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