No Message. No Wink. Just One Like!

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Living abroad in Ireland during 2017, Brigid joined CatholicMatch with hopes of finding a handsome Irish lad.

“Then I’d never move back to the United States!” Brigid, 26, jokes. She didn’t take the site very seriously, and neither did she find the Irish lad she was seeking. Instead, she spent the year traveling around Europe and visiting Marian apparition sites. She spent much of her travels praying for a clear direction on her vocation.

She found herself moving back to the United States earlier than planned, as her sister’s first baby was arriving and Brigid wanted to be with the family during that time. After a few months of settling back in to American living, she took a peek back on her forgotten CatholicMatch profile, just to see if there were any potential matches in her area.

Fred popped up on her search.

Image of couple holding lock in France

“I was instantly attracted to him! I must have felt quite bold, because I went ahead and ‘liked’ his profile photo. No message. No wink or wave. Just one ‘like,’” Brigid remembers.

“At first I was surprised that such a beautiful woman would like a photo of me,” Fred, 31, said when he clicked on her profile.

“I saw that she was from Iowa, and my family lives very close to Iowa. I loved her profile and thought I may as well send her a message.”

Fred, living in Wisconsin, joined Catholic Match on Valentine's Day of 2017. They quickly kicked off a good series of messages, with only one scare.

“One time I replied to the big question of what I thought about long distance relationships being able to work,” he recalls. “I wrote a lengthy response and then...crickets. I could have sworn that she ghosted me and was never going to respond again!” 

Brigid did respond after a couple weeks, surprising Fred with a favorable response.

He wasted no time in asking for her number.

He had a smooth move up his sleeve to jump start a call.

Image of couple standing outside of church

“To break the seal {on texting to calling}, I texted her on a 3 hour drive. After she responded and we shared a few texts I said, ‘Hey I'm driving do you mind if we just talk instead?’ This is the single move I'd share with other guys!” he laughs, noting how hard it can be to easily initiate a phone call.

During that first phone call, they discovered that despite their current three hour distance, they had grown up only 20 minutes apart from each other, and Brigid was still only 20 minutes from the rest of Fred’s family.

His parents even went to the same Bible study as she did!

These little coincidences felt like God was nudging Brigid closer and closer to this man.

They both agreed they were looking for a serious, intentional relationship. But scheduling the first date was hectic. With Fred attending graduate school, teaching full time, and coaching track, he didn’t have much free time for a three hour drive to meet Brigid.

Eventually, the two were able to schedule their first date on Holy Thursday of 2018, when Fred would be up in Brigid’s area to visit his family over Easter weekend.

“Our first date was a little awkward,” Fred laughs.

They went to dinner and then Mass, and spent Good Friday together as well. But conversation didn’t go as smoothly as it had on the phone. Fred chalked it up to nerves, hoping things would improve. But Brigid wasn’t bothered!

Image of couple sitting in giant red Meijer chair

“It was the most perfect first date I’d ever been on, even though we were both quite nervous!” she gushes. “Fred is extremely handsome, and I quickly discovered that he is witty and has a great sense of humor. He's always making me laugh!”

Their relationship deepened from there on out.

The two would take turns visiting each other on the weekends—and Fred’s mother sure was happy to see her son so much! As they got more involved in each other’s lives, Brigid notes that her friends and family loved Fred’s personable demeanor. “I think they may actually love him more than me!”

Fast forward a year, after many discussions about their potential future together, to one of Brigid’s visits to Fred’s area, he brought her to the Holy Hill shrine outside of Milwaukee, to attend First Saturday confession and Mass. It was there that he asked Brigid to spend the rest of her life with him. Brigid was overwhelmed with joy!

“God’s plan has been so beautiful for me, and I have learned that by being patient with His time, wonderful things will happen,” Brigid says. In their photo, you can see the window in the tower where the proposal happened.

The fast pace of wedding planning has allowed them to spend lots of time together.

Image of couple in France

It has been stressful at times, but the couple is ready for the long distance to be behind them. They will be having a big wedding at the end of November 2019, with sixteen bridesmaids and groomsmen, and of course many friends and family attending.

Fred is excited to have his hometown priest officiate the wedding. Brigid, for her part, was surprised at how much work weddings can be, and soon accepted the help from reinforcements: her mom, her four sisters, and a decorator. She is eager to enjoy the day without the stress of planning and organizing everything.

“I really appreciate the amount of love and care Brigid shows me,” Fred says, when asked what his favorite thing about Brigid is. “She pushes me to love more and be more caring for her and others.”

“I appreciate how driven Fred is in everything he sets himself out to do,” Brigid says about Fred. “He is also very strong in his faith and leads me to be the best version of myself while treating me with the utmost respect. I knew very early on that Fred was the man I would marry!”

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