Is dating stressing you out right now?
Or is it more like not dating is stressing you out? Either way, I've got just the thing. A funny movie.
It's called Meet the Patels. What's it about? The stresses of dating... and not dating.
Maybe you've heard of it. Probably you haven't. It's one of those indie films that grabs about a zillion awards you've also never heard of. And it deserves every one of them. It's hilarious and so so true. Guys, happy news: though it's a romantic comedy, it's not your standard chick flick. It's a documentary for one thing. For another, it's seen through the eyes of a guy.
Ravi is an Indian-American who is pushing thirty and isn't married.
This doesn't bother him too too much because he does have an adorable American girlfriend. Besides, having lived in America most of his life, he doesn't think thirty is that big of a deal. But his die hard Indian parents are freaking out because thirty back in the old country is way past your "best by" date.
"You know, the later you show up to a restaurant, the more limited the menu." —Ravi's father.
By the way, Mom and Dad know nothing about the American girlfriend; Ravi knew they wouldn't approve. All they know is that Ravi needs to get married to an Indian girl—STAT.
Ravi respects his parents. They have a long, happy marriage and they only needed to chat for ten minutes to know they'd found "the one." You can't argue with success. Maybe there is something to what they're saying:
"You want to focus on a girl who has the same value in the life and have been raised same way you have, and especially keeping in mind the religion is same." Ravi's mother.
He's just broken up with the American anyway so he agrees to date their way: arranged.
Thus begins a journey of almost epic proportions, or at least the same amount of mileage. And you are along for the ride.
You see, this isn't something that happened to Ravi that he later made a film about. He makes the film while it's happening with the help of his sister who trains a camera on him the whole time. You get to look over his shoulder as weeds through the various photos and "resumes" of Indian American women, then follow as he drags himself all over the country attempting to date them. You're a fruit fly on the wall as he accompanies his parents to a family reunion in India where they and a host of relatives join forces to get him married off.
"Imagine the most annoying person in your family, who's kinda always in your business, asking all sorts of questions and you're trying to just get out of the situation. Now imagine an entire village filled with that person."
The hardest part is that Ravi's got a foot in two worlds.
One is the world of India, with its time honored values and rituals, which produces lasting marriages and also movies about falling in love which contain lots of singing and dancing but no sex.
The other is the world of America, with its habits of instant gratification and fast changing values, which produces a fifty percent divorce rate and movies like Dirty Dancing. (Which reminds me to tell you that there's a two second clip from DD in the early part of this movie. Happily, it turns out to be the only dirty part.)
Ravi's quest is to find someone from that first world, who shares his religion, his values, his culture, his education, and his off-beat relatives. This is next to impossible because he lives and works in the second world, far from India, far from the district in India where his off-beat relatives come from, where everybody is named Patel, which is where he's supposed to shop for a bride.
If you think it's hard to be a Catholic trying to date in a diverse secular America, you might sympathize with this guy.
He's not looking for just a date any more than you are. He wants someone he can build a life with, raise children with, and visit mom and dad with. What's more, he wants to love this woman. All that plus this totally ridiculously ideal woman has got to love him back. But can he even get a second date?
I won't give it away. All that remains to say is that Meet the Patels is free on Amazon Prime and with ads, on Youtube.
