Early in 2020, James joined Catholic Match in hopes of finding his future spouse. He originally spent his time looking at all his local matches in Pennsylvania, but didn’t have luck connecting with someone. He then expanded his search.
“I still couldn't find the lady I was looking for. So I prayed and was inspired to open my search globally,” James says. Then on March 15 that year, he found the profile of a lovely Catholic convert named Raluca, now 41. “She had a gorgeous smile and the prettiest blue eyes!” James, now 50, remembers.
Raluca’s profile lined up with everything James was looking for.
They shared all the same beliefs in the Catholic Church and many common interests. “I prayed for guidance on what to say, other than just ‘hi, how are you?’” James laughs. So he messaged Raluca introducing himself and asking what brought her to the Catholic faith. He also noted how they both had the same favorite Bible verse: Corinthians 13:4-7, “love is patient, love is kind…”
Little did he know that “love is patient” would embody their entire relationship!
Raluca responded quickly, and after a few messages, they switched to phone calls. “We talked for hours about everything and anything and laughed a lot!” James says. They found even more commonalities that neither had listed in their online profiles, too. “I knew right there that she was the one, the answer to my prayers,” James remembers. Soon, after talking about their mutual interest in each other, both of them left CatholicMatch to continue getting to know each other only. Despite being seven time zones apart, they tried to communicate every day, sending messages and talking on the phone whenever they could match up their schedules.
Within a month, they had their first video date.
“It took me a minute to start talking, I was awe-struck!” James says. They spent hours talking and laughing, and began doing weekend video chat dates on top of their daily communication. They shared not only their faith and values, but also their daily lives, funny videos, swapped photos, and listened to music. As the weeks passed, James introduced Raluca to his mother via video, and he was pleased to see they got along well. They also regularly prayed together for an end to the worldwide lockdowns of 2020, which were in full swing everywhere. They wished desperately to meet in person, but there didn’t seem to be an end in sight for the pandemic travel restrictions.
Sometimes, though, love flourishes in the toughest of environments– ”love bears all things,” after all!
“While developing romantic feelings, we also became great support and encouragement for each other during these trying times,” James explains. They leaned on their video dates and blossoming romance to get through the lockdowns and loneliness, and found themselves inspired through prayer together. Around this same time, Raluca reconnected with her estranged father, who was on his deathbed. With James’s support, Raluca was able to reconcile with him, and together they prayed for his soul.
At the end of April, they still saw no opportunity to meet in person. They felt so comfortable with each other and the direction of their relationship, though, that they started talking about engagement rings. James told Raluca about the Claddagh ring and its symbolism, and she was as enchanted with it as he was! So, James went out on a bit of a limb and ordered an emerald Claddagh ring, with plans to propose after he and Raluca were able to meet in real life.
Fast forward to June, and lockdowns and travel restrictions were still going strong.
What was James to do? “Love hopes all things,” as the verse goes. So James changed his plans. Instead of waiting to meet in person and propose then, James popped the question over video chat! His hopes were not disappointed–Raluca said yes. He put the Claddagh ring in the mail, so she could wear it while they waited out the pandemic.
“It was through faith, hope and prayer we faced the next year and a half together until we finally would meet in person!” James says. What a test of true love! Over the next eighteen months, the two focused on communication and prayerful connection. They became best friends as well as fiances! They weathered Raluca’s mother’s chemotherapy treatment, as well as the passing of her reconciled father. During this time, James’s mother also became ill and passed away. “Love endures all things,” though, and their relationship only got stronger with the challenges.
Raluca was working from home as a business intelligence specialist, and since James was short on carpentry work due to the pandemic, they were able to call each other early in the morning and the evening. On Sundays, they would watch online Mass together. When Romania began easing up on the shelter-in-place laws, James was able to video chat in on some of Raluca’s walks in the park or public places she frequented. “To this day, we still have the headsets on everywhere we go, so we can share as much as we can of our daily lives with each other!” James explains.
The long-awaited moment arrived in September of 2021.
James finally got to fly to Romania to meet Raluca in person for the first time! “We were both shaking and had tears in our eyes when we saw each other at the airport!” they recall. James made an “official” proposal in person, and they got to spend an entire month together cooking, attending church, meeting Raluca’s nearest and dearest, and watching movies for date night. Being together in person confirmed once and for all their initial love at first sight, and they knew they were meant to be together.
“We promised each other that we would get married as soon as we could,” James said as they parted again at the airport in October. The two spent several months gathering all the necessary documents and planning their wedding. James flew to Romania a second time in May of 2022, this time to get married!
They married in Saint Anthony’s Church in Constanta, Romania, near the Black Sea. This parish was special to Raluca, because it’s where she had converted: “love rejoices with the truth!” She also added a special touch to her bouquet: daisies, the favorite flower of James’s late mother.
Today, they are finishing the paperwork for Raluca to come to join James back in Pennsylvania.
“I know that through hope and prayer we will finally be reunited!” James says. Their favorite part of marriage so far has been to coordinate the time zone difference so they can attend Mass on Sunday at the same time: 6:00 P.M. for her and 11:00 A.M. for him.
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