For me, the attractive aspect of writing success stories for CatholicMatch is that couples entrust me with the retelling of some of the most important and memorable moments in their lives. I keep in contact with many of the couples I interview, and some of them I count as friends. Eric and Janine are one of those couples. We have stayed in touch since they first shared their story with me in 2015. Their Success Story happens to be one of my most popular posts.
Eric is one-of-a-kind; not because he has Osteogenesis imperfecta (OI) but because he's so determined and undaunted by life. Eric was so dedicated to finding "the one" that he made a lot of flights to frozen Canada—snow is not easy to navigate in a wheelchair—to see Janine. They fell in love and tied the knot on Valentine's Day 2015.
Via Skype, Eric and Janine shared with me how married life is going and how their 16-month-old daughter, Charlotte, is doing.
What have been the best part of being married?
Janine: Charlotte and just being a family is awesome—we are our own family now.
Eric: That I am not dating! Seriously, it’s the peace knowing that we have each other, and we’re in this union together brings me a lot of joy. It’s been a wild ride going on three years. We demolished our house and rebuilt it. Found out that we were pregnant with Charlotte, and then discovered that she also has OI. Then we had to figure out how to be parents on top of being newlyweds.
Did you want to be parents right away?
Janine: Yes, we were talking to a doctor because we had been married for nine months, and we weren’t pregnant yet. We wanted to see where our hormones were at. I decided to take a pregnancy test, and it was positive, so I took two more.
Eric: She sprung it on me. We were happy but surprised.
Were you were worried that your baby would also have OI?
Janine: There was some anxiety about it, but we talked a lot about it. We both knew that it would be okay. We wanted to have kids.
Eric: It would be naïve and disingenuous not to be worried. We worried, "What will our baby go through? How will we manage her care in utero and after birth, if she has OI?" That was all mitigated by knowing that we would just accept whatever happened. We thought it would work out, and we trusted that God would provide for Charlotte and us. Also, technology is way more advanced than when my parents had me. We also had the advantage of knowing beforehand unlike my parents. Even so, we knew it might be challenging.
And has it been challenging having a baby with OI?
Janine: It's just different. We had to figure out how to hold, move, change, and dress her as gently as possible. You can’t lift her legs to change her bum; you have to scoop her up under her bum. You can never grab her arms or legs even. Those few accommodations that we had to make are now second nature.
Eric: We also had my experience of what was good for me and what wasn’t. My parents were helpful. Charlotte has the advantage that I never did; there’s a lot of exotic treatments available now that weren’t available to me. She gets treatment every six months with a drug that was originally designed for osteoporosis patients.
Is OI the same disease the villain had in the movie Unbreakable?
Eric: Yes, it’s the only pop culture reference to the disease that I know of.
What’s Charlotte like?
Eric: She’s hard not to love. She’s extremely charismatic.
Janine, you left your chiropractic business in Canada to move to California. Do you miss it?
Janine: Yeah, I made a brief comeback here. I signed the contract two days after I found out I was pregnant. I built a small clientele and then went on maternity leave. I am not working now because finding childcare, considering Charlotte’s OI, was too difficult. We’ll reevaluate in a couple of years. [Charlotte has just woken up and has joined the conversation. It's amusing to watch her because I can tell she wants to nurse.]
Have there been any surprises regarding married life?
Eric: There wasn’t any grand surprise. We came into the marriage knowing each other pretty well. Janine didn’t take a mask off on the wedding night. "My gosh, who are you?" We Skyped every day for two years. We probably talked more than if we lived in the same town.
How about marital challenges?
Janine: We had a lot of learning and adjusting. We didn’t even live in the same country when we were dating.
Eric: Living with my mom while our house was being renovated. Trying to be really quiet at night when we went to bed.
How has being a parent changed your marriage?
Eric: It’s pretty awesome. It’s different because Charlotte’s the priority. Though, we enjoy our time alone in the evening when Charlotte is sleeping.
Janine: It helped to make our bond stronger because now we are a team. There’s so much doubt and uncertainty when you are a mom; I feel this has opened up a lot of communication between Eric and me because I turn to him.
Any parting thoughts?
Eric: CatholicMatch has been such an unexpected blessing. Obviously, there's Janine, but then there are people like you who've become friends. Janine and I went out for drinks with a couple who met on CatholicMatch, too. I actually met the woman on the site when we were both single and looking for the right person. We remained friends over the years as we both married other CM members and started families.
If you would like to read more about Eric and his inspiring life story, please check out my column, Everyday Miracles, on CatholicDigest.com.
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