Roy & Marian at her sock hop bash.
Her 70th Birthday Party Turned Into an Engagement Party
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Marian wanted to make sure her 70th birthday was one to remember. For two years, she had been planning a sock hop themed party because she loves to dance, and she’s a fan of the music from the 50’s & 60’s.
Marian rented a hall and hired a caterer and DJ. When she made all of these plans, she didn’t have a clue that this party would also be the day her family found out that she was getting married again.
Before Roy's wife died, she had told him he should marry again.
Roy knew something about what it took to have a happy marriage. He and his wife, Michelle, had been married for 37 years. Before she died, she told Roy that he should marry again.
Marian had been married to her husband, Dennis, for 30 years. Those last years, she had taken care of him because he suffered from dementia. Knowing him, she knew that Dennis wouldn't want her to spend the rest of her life alone.
Both Roy and Marian thought that God would send them a second spouse.
They were a bit apprehensive about online dating but, being "cradle to coffin" Catholics, Roy and Marian figured CatholicMatch would be an ideal place to meet other Catholics looking to find a spouse.
It took Marian having a membership for over two years, on and off, to find Roy. Liking what she saw in Roy's profile, Marian took the initiative and sent him a message. Unfortunately, Roy couldn’t reply because he hadn’t renewed his membership after being on CatholicMatch for seven months.
“I was intrigued by Marian’s picture and profile enough to rejoin,” Roy, 70, explains.
Rejoining CatholicMatch paid off.
Roy’s reply to Marian’s message was the beginning of a volley of messages.
Five weeks later, on August 21st, 2017, they met up in scenic Red Wing, Minnesota, because it was halfway between Roy’s daughter Angela’s house, in Winona, Minnesota, and Marian’s home in Savage, Minnesota—Roy's residence was in Anamosa, Iowa, some 282 miles from Marian.
They met for the first time at Caribou Coffee and then went for lunch at a Perkins and a walk by the river.
“Of course, we were both apprehensive, and a bit nervous but we’re both good communicators and the conversation was easy,” shares Marian, 70.
The date went so well that Marian invited Roy to come to Savage for Labor Day weekend to meet her family. A few weeks later, they met up in Winona to celebrate Roy’s birthday.
“Roy’s grandkids are twins (girl & boy), and were 3 1/2 years old at the time,” Marian explains, “When Roy’s daughter, Angela, asked the one twin who she wanted to sit by for supper the little girl turned around and pointed at me and said, ‘Her.’ Later on, Angela told me, ‘You were in right then.’”
Soon, they were ready to live closer and for a permanent commitment...marriage.
Marian and Roy's family celebrating Marian's 70th birthday with a sock hop.
Roy had wanted to sell his house in Iowa to move closer to his daughter and his grandkids in Minnesota. With his relationship with Marian deepening and the price of homes rising, he thought it was the time to sell, but instead of moving to Winona, he had plans to move Savage because he wanted to marry Marian.
After eight months of long-distance dating, both Roy and Marian were ready for a permanent commitment, but neither of them felt the need for a fancy proposal.
“We just decided that it was time,” Roy says.
The couple thought the most practical thing was for Roy to move into Marian’s home after the wedding. “Since we love each other, it didn’t make sense to sell and buy something else when I have a nice home,” Marian says.
Their kids only wondered what had taken them so long.
On May 5th, 2018, at the sock hop, the couple broke the news to both of their families that they were getting married.
"Roy and I got engaged three days prior but hadn’t said anything to our kids, so we asked them to arrive early and took them aside and asked if they were okay with us getting married," Marian remembers. "They, of course, thought it was a great idea and had been wondering when it was going to happen and what we were waiting for."
Roy had been a widow for nearly six years and Marian for over four years, so their families felt they'd been alone long enough.
They were married in an intimate ceremony surrounded by family.
Roy and Marian were wed at the Church of the Risen Savior in Burnsville, Minnesota, on September 8th, 2018, the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. It was an intimate celebration with their children, grandkids, siblings, and their spouses. Afterward, they had a catered lunch and continued the festivities at Marian's house.
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