For Them, CatholicMatch Was "Totally Worth It"!
11
One wintry day in 2015, three best friends huddled together around a computer in a college dorm room and created a CatholicMatch profile. Neither Laura nor Morgan had a profile themselves (though both would also go on to meet their spouses on CatholicMatch!) at that time, but they looked on and offered advice as Liz signed up. Liz reports being “off and on” CM several times, for three to six months each time, but a handful of first dates hadn’t progressed to any long-term relationships by the time she sent Ryan a message in the summer of 2017.
For his part, Ryan had considered signing up for more than a year before biting the bullet in late spring/early summer of 2017. Little did he know that the love of his life would message him just a month or so later!
He was glad she didn’t send an emoji!
She recalled, “I sent messages to at least a handful of men because I was used to them responding back with just an emoji, or [saying they’re] not really interested, or not responding at all.” Liz had previously discerned religious life for over a year with the Dominican sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist in Ann Arbor, Michigan, and felt sure of both her vocation to marriage as well as what qualities she was looking for in a spouse. As she looked closer at Ryan’s profile, she saw that his core values, including a deep love for the Faith and commitment to family, matched her own. She also appreciated that he had a devotion to St. Michael. And it didn’t hurt that they shared common interests of farming, being outdoors, and gardening.
When Ryan received Liz’s message, he was relieved that she didn’t send an emoji, since in his experience emojis didn’t communicate much about the sender and left him confused as to how to respond! As he looked through her profile, he liked her pictures and “that she looked fun and spunky.” He was also intrigued to learn that she had discerned religious life.
Her friend followed them to their first date for safety...
After messaging back and forth for a few months, Liz and Ryan met in person on Labor Day, halfway between their Minnesota hometowns. For security, Liz had a friend and the friend’s boyfriend drive separately and show up at the same location to make sure Ryan was on the up and up. The situation could easily have turned awkward, because the coffee shop Liz and Ryan intended to meet at was closed, but luckily for her Ryan was so nervous that he didn’t even notice the third car in the otherwise empty lot.
Liz laughed as she later found that "Ryan would literally never hurt a fly". Seriously, on a phone call when we were dating he talked me through the whole process of trying to release a spider off into the wild and was so distressed over the loss of one of its limbs in the process!”
During that first date, the couple biked around town and enjoyed ice cream afterward. Liz called it “the best and longest first date I had experienced!” Ryan knew that the date had gone well when he asked for a hug at the end and received not one but two! The couple went on several more dates before making the relationship official on September 24th, 2017.
She knew before the first date that she wanted to marry him!
Both Liz’s time in the convent as well as the first dates she’d been on before solidified for her both what she was and wasn’t looking for in a future spouse. The more she and Ryan got to know each other via messages, “it was just clear to me. We could talk about anything, and he liked talking at length. We joke today that the first thing we talked about was mosquitoes [because of something for his work as a hydrologist]. We had paragraphs upon paragraphs about mosquitoes, going back and forth, before Ryan finally switched the topic! In my mind, it’s like ‘if I can have this kind of conversation and enjoy it this much with this person who I think I’m really attracted to, if [this first date] works out, I’m going to marry this guy!”
Reflecting back on their first date, Liz wrote in her journal “I met him, Ryan Meyer. I really didn’t think a pure-hearted, pure-of-intention, striving man was out there. I knew God would fill my desires in an insurmountable way, but not like this. And now I am in love. That’s all there is to it. He waltzed right into my life when I needed a softening of my heart most.” Amazingly, that page in Liz’s journal was the only readable page left after the couple’s basement flooded early this spring.
Engagement time!
On September 24th, 2018, to celebrate the year anniversary of their becoming boyfriend and girlfriend, Ryan told Liz he was taking her to a fancy Italian restaurant. She stayed at his parents’ house that weekend, and remembers taking her sweet time getting all dolled up for the occasion. Since they didn’t have reservations, she was surprised that Ryan seemed so anxious to get going on the date! He told her he wanted to stop along the way at farm property he had bought, which she knew was intended to eventually be for their someday home together. And while that locale might have tipped her off at another time, Liz wasn’t anticipating a proposal because three separate weekends had already passed when she felt sure that he would propose - but nothing happened! What she couldn’t know at those earlier times was that her ring wasn’t yet ready because of an issue making it.
When Ryan asked her to go for a walk with him down by the creek in her long dress, she felt more irritated than expectant. But when he told her he’d forgotten something in the truck, and walked back with a small box in his hands, she knew the time had come! After “a short speech,” he proposed and she excitedly accepted!
They rode a hayride to the reception!
Liz and Ryan were married on August 24th, 2019. The couple’s reception was held on the farm property Ryan had purchased, prepared with much love and support from both his and her families. After their small-town Minnesota wedding, the couple and their entire wedding party were transported via hayride to the reception. Ryan noted that they stopped at a local bar en route, and caught the bar staff completely off guard because they were anticipating spectators from an event called Wrestlemania which was being held that same weekend! The employees hadn’t planned on a wedding party stopping in instead!
Now, the couple is happily celebrating their third year of marriage with their two young children.
Asked what advice they would offer to singles considering signing up for CatholicMatch, Ryan quipped, “just try it, and if you're confused when people just send you emojis, that's normal!” Liz elaborated, “If you're tired of waiting around for something to happen, it is SO worth the money. Online dating thru CM is the effective way to find someone who shares your similar values in the faith. We no longer live in a society where you can just meet someone at a bar or social gathering and spend the rest of your life with them! Join Catholic Match, you never know who you will find!”