May of 2011, Tami, from Northern Kentucky, met and fell in love with a Peruvian gentleman named Felix. Click here to read how they met on CatholicMatch. The only trouble was they had a difficult time setting the date for the wedding—though it was no fault of theirs.
Originally, the couple planned to be married on January 21, 2012. Months earlier, Tami had applied for a fiancé visa to bring Felix up from Peru, but it didn't go through. “Let’s just say God had other plans that had me kicking and screaming a few more months,” Tami recalls.
Tami was resigned to be patient, but she wasn’t too pleased. “On February 21, 2102, after six months of swimming in a black hole, word came that our case was approved. … The news brought bliss.
At last, at long last, this was happening!” Confident that Felix would be in the United States soon, they set a new wedding date for April 13. “Sure, it was Friday the 13th and two little nieces were due to be born soon, but it was all going to work out. I was confident. I had faith.”
Unfortunately, it was not to be! The visa interview was postponed. Long last on April 23, Felix got his much-anticipated visa and was free to travel. “On May 5, I welcomed him into my arms, never to let him go again. We had just two weeks to make final preparations for our now May 18, 2012, wedding. After all, we still had to get him a wedding band, a suit coat, and a haircut for the big day!”
The day of their wedding was a beautiful spring day in Michigan. “Looking back, I see God’s fingerprints all over our journey.”
The Journey Since the Wedding
Much has happened since all those delayed wedding plans; Tami and Felix have a son and now are awaiting their second child due January 2015. I asked her about the joys and challenges of being married and having children. For Tami, the biggest joys of being married are having Felix companionship, support, and love. Her child and unborn child are also a big part of her and Felix’s happiness in their marriage.
Another not to be understated joy is that they both have a good sense of humor, so they keep each other laughing.
Like any good marriage, there are conflicts. Some of their points of contention arise because of cultural differences. “Since Felix is from South America and was raised differently, there are certain things he is really passionate about or insistent on that really could go either way for me. For example, he struggled through college in a foreign language (English) paying double tuition and working three jobs, so as you can imagine he highly values education and thinks that it is not optional for our kids to go to college. I, on the other hand, say: ‘What if they want to be a farmer?’”
Like many couples, they soon discovered that money matters can be a huge stress in a marriage. “Our biggest challenge has been getting on track financially since we both had student loans. We will be lucky if we buy our first house by the time we're 40.”
Little Blessings
Having children has been a huge blessing for the couple. They say, “There is nothing like hearing your baby call you Mama (or Dada).” The children have also bonded the couple and helped them to get to know each other better.
Tami says, “I believe having children has strengthened our marriage because it has allowed us to get to know each other in many different capacities. How we react when we're tired, frustrated, etc. What our thoughts are about discipline, what is acceptable and not acceptable. It also helps us to slow down or take a break from our devices to spend quality time as a family.”
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