Why I Won't Text You Merry Christmas

The a cappella group, Straight No Chaser, teamed up with Kristen Bell to produce a new Christmas song, "Text Me Merry Christmas." This is such a clever and catchy miss-you-at-Christmas song (that also pokes fun at people who tend to be staring at their phones a little too much). But it also can be a theme song for long-distance couples. Since my husband and I were in a long-distance relationship, I understand the importance of modern technology to help couples stay in touch. And even though texting someone "Merry Christmas" is not at all bad, I challenge you to go a little deeper. I invite you to take advantage of the opportunities to make more meaningful connections with the people in your life—right now.

I have a personal reason for making this challenge. It all started the Thanksgiving previous to my engagement to my husband, Alex, I had spent that holiday away from my family. No one knew it then, but that year was the last opportunity I had to spend the holiday with my older sister. This missed family Thanksgiving also meant I missed the first opportunity to meet my future brother-in-law, too. The following Thanksgiving, my sister was married and lived 700 miles away. A year later, she was living in another continent altogether.

Luckily she's been able to visit the family every few Christmases since then, but realizing how fast events can unfold made me appreciate the present and want to make the best out of the time that I do have with my family. This experience is what lead my husband, Alex, and I to decide to spend our first Christmas apart, even though we were recently engaged. Knowing that we were going to be apart for our first Christmas was difficult, but we knew it'd be our last one that way. We sacrificed that time together for the benefit of our siblings.

This Christmas, reflect on the gift of people in your life. Reflect on the love of your parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, godparents, grandparents. Even if you've lost someone this year or previous years, their love has been perfected through Christ in Heaven, so it should mean more to you now than it did before. Not to mention, those souls in Heaven have strong intercessory power. It's easy for us to long for the gifts of people not within our grasp, like a spouse, children, or even grandchildren. Remember God has provided us with all we need in our current state of life, even if in our limited knowledge we disagree. While we have longing for these other things or people, let's not take for granted the gifts God has already given us.

This Christmas, try to be the smallest person in the room. It's always nice to be the most popular person in the room, and you certainly are when you're with your significant other. It's also nice to put on appearances for yourself, your family and friends, to put your happiness on display. Instead let the attention pour over the other family members. Attend to their little needs like refilling someone's coffee or bringing their favorite dessert. Listen to the same stories your family tells each and every year, because if they're still being told, they're important to someone. If you really long to have a family of your own, immerse yourself in the family God gave you today. Be mentally present in the room and vow not to text anyone for a whole day.

If there are old wounds there in your family relationships, make those first steps to say "I'm sorry" or "I forgive you." Refrain from texting or emailing this important message; rather find a way to convey it in person with supporting actions. It won't be easy, but if God had the humility to veil His divinity in human flesh, particularly as an unborn child, then certainly we can muster up some humility to apologize or offer forgiveness.

Remember when the prodigal son returned to his father, he didn't just slip in a "sorry" and then go back to his old ways. He made a true repentance and humbled himself by planning to ask to be one of his father's servants.

Make that effort to create intimate relationships with the people God has already given you, especially your family. In addition to texting Merry Christmas, consider calling your friends and loved ones. Even a brief message can bring Christmas joy to the ones you care about.