Who Is This Foreign Guy Emailing Me?

Angela first joined CatholicMatch in 2005. Over the next few years, she was an on-and-off subscriber.

“I moved to California in 2008 and left the site, as I was focused on my career and building a life across the country. I had to move back East in 2011 and decided to re-open my account then,” Angela said.

Several more years passed and her 35th birthday was around the corner. “As my 35th birthday approached though, I sort of gave up. I felt like a lot of men were looking for women who were a bit younger than me, and I experienced some of that personally too,” Angela said.

It was at that point that she met the love of her life. However, at first, it was anything but.

In July 2014, she started receiving messages from a Lithuanian immigrant named Paulius, who, ironically—she notes—was two years younger than her.

“Paulius is from Europe originally, when I first saw his email, I’m not going to lie I thought ‘Who’s this foreign guy emailing me?’” Angela said.

She ignored his first few messages.

What made her change her mind?

“Finally I decided to click on his profile. I thought it was interesting that he was from Lithuania originally, because some of my family came from Lithuania four generations ago! He was very handsome and his profile was honest, simple, straightforward and humble.”

Because he lived nearby, she agreed to meet. But she also says she had no expectations because she’d already given up on meeting someone she could marry. One further wrinkle: at the time, Paulius was divorced. He received an annulment soon after he contacted her, but his divorce and annulment were initially off-putting to Angela.

For their first date they met for coffee and then ordered dinner from food truck. Paulius worked at an office that was close to her home so the pair started meeting up afterwards.

"We would go out, or walk, go to the city, or cook. Very simple, but we spent a lot of time together! Tuesdays and Thursdays became our routine and Paulius just kept coming around.”

“Every date with Angela was unique, fun, full of energy and excitement. We mostly had active dates: walking, biking and having dinners together. It was truly fun to see her and I was always looking forward to our date,” Paulius said.

“Again, I really still had no expectations for the relationship. I just liked spending time with him. I would say our relationship was just a simple one that blossomed over time,” Angela added.

She treated everyone else so well, Paulius knew she was a keeper

Paulius says he realized she was the one for him by observing her love of family and God. “I knew I will be in good hands if she only treated me half as well as others,” Paulius said.

“Paulius has a number of great qualities. He’s handsome, funny, sweet and very open minded—which you have to be to date a practicing Catholic! We are counter cultural in some ways!” Angela said.

But above all else she says it was his humility that stood out. Paulius never came across as someone who was trying to make an impression and Angela, in turn, did not feel under pressure to impress him. She says that allowed a friendship to develop and bolster their blossoming relationship.

After about six months of dating, Angela and Paulius went to Lithuania for the holidays. “I got to spend time with Paulius’ family and see the country. It was amazing,” Angela said.

Praying for a miracle in Lithuania

On January 3, 2015 Paulius took her to a place in Vilnius, the country’s capital, where there had been a protest against the Soviet Union in 1991. Their tour included a stop by a special spot near the city cathedral.

“There is a ‘miracle’ tile there outside of the cathedral square where you can pray...for a miracle,” Angela said.

“The real miracle of that spot was the freedom Lithuania was granted in 1991, but for me I still prayed for the ‘miracle’ of marriage.”

Later in the day, Paulius took her to Gediminas Tower—the last remnant of a medieval castle in downtown Vilnius.

It was there—at the top of the tower—that he proposed to her. Roughly ten months later the two married.

Our path to marriage was unexpected

Both Angela and Paulius say their path to a happy marriage was an unexpected one.

“I never thought I would marry someone younger than me, or divorced for that matter, but in the end I see the beauty in this situation. Paulius learned a lot and grew in his earlier relationship. To me, he was better positioned to understand the true sacrifices of marriage in addition to the benefits,” Angela said.

For his part, Paulius says he thinks of Angela as an angel sent to him by God.

“I feel that God truly blessed me by sending His own Angel called Angela my way. I had both emotional and physical suffering for many years in my prior marriage. God was patient. He waited for me by holding Angela until I was finally ready to meet her. I will do my best to not disappoint Him in our marriage and happy life together,” Paulius said.