When St. Therese Doesn't Give You a Rose

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Shortly after my husband and I got married, we began a novena to St. Therese of Lisieux, that “famous” one that is supposedly a fool-proof method of discerning the will of God. In the early stages of my Catholic faith, I would often hear personal anecdotes from friends about how they prayed this nine-day set of prayers through the intercession of St. Therese, and on the last day, they would miraculously receive roses, often of a specific color, which would confirm what they were praying about.

Now, while we aren’t supposed to rely solely on miraculous signs from heaven, praying a novena in such a way as this is a great demonstration of faith and heroic confidence that one’s prayers are indeed heard.

We started the novena with excitement and wonder at what color roses St. Therese would send us...

Having just discovered my pregnancy with our first child, my husband and I felt we needed to discern God’s will for our marriage. We knew that Kansas (where we currently lived) was not the ideal place to raise our family, as it was quite far from both of our homes. So, we started the novena, asking for St. Therese’s intercession on the matter.

And, we got specific. We asked for a rose to confirm the prayer, but gave her three options: a white rose for Wisconsin (my husband’s home state), a red rose for Kansas, and a yellow rose for Colorado (my home state). “I’m excited!” I remember exclaiming to my husband as we began the novena.

When we neared the last day, waiting for our rose made me feel like a kid waiting for Christmas. However, day nine came and went: no rose. Weeks came and went: no rose. What gave?! We had prayed the novena with expectant faith that we would see a rose. In our great American way, we expected to get answers ASAP.

But after the last day of the novena, no roses appeared. Until...

As providence would have it, we ended up spending two more years in Kansas as missionaries. Then, two babies later, due to some very open doors presented to us—not roses—we made a big move out to Colorado. About a month after we had moved, we walked into a friends’ house for a visit, and my eyes immediately were drawn to the fireplace mantel, on top of which sat a beautiful bouquet of fresh yellow roses. Interesting, I thought as I remembered the color stipulations of the novena from two years before. But probably a coincidence, I resolved.

The next Sunday, at our new parish, I found my son hiding behind a statue of the Holy Family. Sticking out of St. Joseph’s hand was a yellow rose. There were no other flowers on the statue. This made me pause for a second, but again I brushed it off.

The following week, right before entering a business meeting, I noticed something shooting out of the rocks next to the building. It was—you guessed it—a wild yellow rose. Now, this was too weird and random to ignore. Someone once told me that if you see or hear the same thing three times, it’s God’s way of getting your attention. Well, He certainly had my attention with these roses now!

Perhaps God's delay in giving us a sure sign was His way of leading us to greater faith.

It appeared that St. Therese had finally answered our novena from over two years ago. It certainly was not in the initial timeframe we had hoped for, and it was not even in the manner we were expecting. There were other, rather normal circumstances which allowed for us to make our move to Colorado. The discernment for us was not the product of a miracle, but a passage of time which confirmed the path God was leading us on.

Oftentimes, God speaks more in whispers than in thunder. However, the Lord knows our need for affirmation, especially at the genesis of such a new venture, and so with a little help from St. Therese, He decided to give us this consolation through a tangible sign.

God will always direct us towards the path He wants us to walk. Praying novenas and looking for signs have nothing to do with us changing God’s mind, and much to do with increasing our own dependence and total trust in our loving Father. The two years in which God (and St. Therese) made us wait for our roses just goes to show that everything is revealed within His perfect timing, not ours.

The next time I’m faced with a big decision, will I pray a novena? Possibly. Will I pray earnestly for God to bless the steps that I’m taking, but also do my own, natural part on moving through a decision, trusting that He is with me even in the whispers? Absolutely.

“Commit your way to the Lord, Trust in Him, he will act.” (Psalm 37:5)

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