Vidal of Chicago had tried meeting someone on other dating apps but found it challenging to meet someone who was genuinely Catholic and lived out the faith daily. After using CatholicMatch for three months, he met Renee.
Renee of Las Vegas, New Mexico, had never considered online dating. But with more time on her hands in the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic, she tried it and quickly met Vidal.
After initial reservations about distance and online dating, the pair connected.
Vidal joined CatholicMatch in March 2020 and searched for someone in his local area. But, not particularly intrigued by any profiles he saw, he expanded his search to show profiles further away and eventually nationwide. He came across Renee’s profile, which caught his attention. He noticed she listened to Spanish music and was beautiful. The only catch was that she lived several states away in New Mexico, so he chose not to make contact. But, just days later, Renee’s came up again. This time, he “liked” her profile. After she “liked” his profile, Vidal sent her a message.
For her part, Renee had previously promised herself that she would never date online. One of her friends initially wanted to make a CatholicMatch profile with her, but she said no. Then, as her work in campus ministry at New Mexico State University slowed down due to the pandemic and curiosity about what online dating looked like, Renee made a profile but only the free version in May 2020. Upon seeing Vidal’s profile, she was thrilled to see he mentioned her favorite band, Morat, and several of their songs. She decided to “like” his profile, prompting Vidal to send that first message. Because she was a free user, she had to wait ten days to see that message, but it ended up being well worth the wait.
From the start, the pair was clear on their intentions to date with marriage and a family in mind, knowing that in time, they’d have to decide where they would live.
They spent hours chatting online, then met familiar strangers in person.
Following that initial message, the two began chatting on CatholicMatch, then moved to Facebook Messenger and had their first Facetime call in June 2020. About two months later, after countless hours of talking on the phone, the couple took the next step and met in person.
In the hours before Vidal arrived in New Mexico, Renee was so nervous that her hands were sweaty, and she couldn’t even eat. Despite all their chatting, they had no idea how the other smelled, how tall they really were, or, most importantly, whether they would get along in person without being able to hang up the phone.
To Renee’s great relief, they both experienced this odd feeling of meeting a familiar stranger upon his arrival. Every aspect of their online interactions continued, but now in full color. After this first visit, they decided to continue pursuing this relationship.
Over the next two years, they met each other’s families, visited one another in their respective cities, attended company holiday and birthday parties together, and discovered more about the future they desired to build together. After counsel from friends and family, Vidal and Renee decided in May 2022 that they would reside in Albuquerque, NM. Now, all that was needed was the proposal.
He flew to Albuquerque to meet with her father and brought him to Chicago for the proposal without her knowing.
Renee had mentioned early on in the relationship that she wanted her parents around for the proposal, and Vidal wanted the same thing. Since their parents lived in two different states, he only had two opportunities that year to make that happen. During a trip to Chicago, Renee had planned with her mother and younger brother in June, the other when his parents were possibly traveling to New Mexico in October. Being at the point where he was 100% sure he wanted to propose, he didn’t want to wait until October, so June it was.
With Renee’s mother coming to Chicago, Vidal also needed to find a way to get her father there. He flew to Albuquerque for about 26 hours just a week before the trip, had dinner with her father, asked for his blessing and invited him to Chicago, and met with some of Renee’s close friends without her knowing. Thankfully, he gave Vidal his blessing and agreed to make the trip.
Renee’s mother and brother arrived on June 23rd, and Vidal planned to propose the next day, June 24th, when her father would be flying in. To have his family present for the proposal without raising suspicions, he arranged to have a picnic dinner before going to a Chicago White Sox game at Tom Ping Memorial Park in the city’s Chinatown.
Vidal’s brother-in-law, niece, aunt, and uncle (Who brought his camera to take pictures of the proposal) had also come to the park. Vidal’s parents were the last to arrive and had picked up Renee’s father at the airport, unbeknownst to her. When he finally proposed, and she said “yes,” he called Renee’s father over, who had been watching from a distance.
They were married by a priest they both got to know well.
After their engagement in June 2022, just under a year passed before the wedding day. In addition to marriage prep with the church they chose to get married in, they also went through a discernment marriage prep questionnaire through FOCCUS Marriage Ministries with Fr. Ray Flores, O.S.A.
Fr. Ray knew Renee from her time at New Mexico State University, where he was the pastor of their Newman Center. Shortly after she graduated college, he discerned and eventually became an Augustinian brother, eventually moving to Chicago, only six miles from where Vidal lived. Renee got them connected, and they began having meals together occasionally. “Since he knew us both individually and discerning as a couple, we thought he was the best fit to lead us on our marriage prep,” Renee recalled.
The wedding took place on June 17th, 2023, at the Church of the Incarnation in Rio Rancho, New Mexico, surrounded by family and friends. Fr. Ray was the main presider of the wedding mass; there were also five other priests celebrating the mass. Vidal and Renee are now adjusting to married life in Albuquerque.
Vidal’s advice for anyone using CatholicMatch, especially for men nervous about reaching out to someone, is to “Just do it. Be open to how a conversation may go. Also, to men in particular, be clear with your intentions from the start.”
Renee’s advice is to be honest with yourself in order to be honest with other users and have true discernment. “So, if we were both discerning and we both said we were okay with long distance, then one of us really wasn’t, then it wouldn’t have worked out. We had to have those hard conversations where we had to be honest. Sometimes, they’re scary because these conversations don’t lead to a happy ending, but luckily for us, it did.”
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