He was hesitant when his eyes landed on her profile. She was so far away, nowhere near where he lived. Was he up for a long distance relationship? Did they have enough in common? She was so beautiful—was she out of his league?
And most of all, he had only been on the site for a month...was it too soon? He skimmed her profile anyway and couldn't look away...
“What I saw was a picture of the most beautiful woman in the world. Her smile had a kind warmness to it which automatically drew me to her. I was kind of smitten and I hadn't even really viewed her profile yet. Of course, at warp speed, I proceeded to click, and optimistically began to read everything in her profile,” Colim said.
Colim, then 37 and from Ireland, was intrigued with Helen's profile description of her “love for God and family.” “The warm manner in which Helen wrote corresponded to her warm beautiful smile. And of course, the other pics in her profile had literally rendered me powerless not to contact her,” Colim said.
He sent his unexpected match, who was in her early 30s and lived in the Philippines, a smiley face emoticon. And then followed up with a message: “I like your take on family.”
“This one-liner intro got me,” Helen said.
God been preparing him for her
They started chatting and soon decided to be exclusive by only talking to each other. Beside their common faith and commitment to family, both had a shared passion for the Lord of the Rings. “It was great; she loved the trilogy as much as I did. What a start!” Colim recalled.
After nearly half a year of a long-distance relationship, Colim and Helen talked about meeting in person in the Philippines.
For Colim, it would be his first time in the country. But it would not be his first exposure to Filipino culture. Looking back, he says that God, unbeknownst to him, used a childhood friendship to pave the way for his future relationship with Helen.
In secondary school, one of Colim’s best friends was a boy from London named Jared, who was half Filipino. As he had gotten to know Jared, he also became familiar with others in the broader Filipino community. “Over the years I got to see how God-loving and welcoming many Filipino people are, and different qualities that one should aspire to have. Lo and behold, I never could have imagined that my future wife, praise God, would be from the very country whose culture I had experienced thanks to my best friend Jared,” Colim said.
Small acts of kindness made him smitten all over again
Three days before Christmas 2015, Colim’s plane touched down in Manila, the capital of the Philippines. He didn’t meet Helen until the next day, when he received a knock at his door. Colim went to the door with a mix of excitement and nervousness. He started to pull the door open but couldn’t wait, so he anxiously peeked around the edge to see Helen for the first time.
“As soon as we locked eyes, we started exchanging friendly words, which were quickly followed by a whole lot of joyous laughter. I have often mentioned to Helen that the image of seeing her laugh and giggle at my doorstep will stay with me for the rest of my life. It’s one of my life’s treasures I am forever thankful for,” Colim said.
Meeting her in person that Christmas, Colim was smitten all over again. He was touched by the small things about her actions and demeanor—“from her kind gesture of bringing me food the first time we met, to her dignity in all that she does, to the way she works selflessly for her family, to the humility I see in her as she prays.”
“It became quickly apparent during my time spent with Helen, that she was profoundly greater than anything I could have imagined,” Colim said.
Helen felt likewise: “The first time I saw him, I thought to myself, ‘He is so handsome. He is more than the man I thought him to be,’” Helen recalled.
Persevering through legal roadblocks
When Colim returned to Ireland, their relationship intensified, and they started talking about marriage. “This is what makes CatholicMatch so unique, since it is not strictly a dating website; it’s a place to meet and chat with like-minded Catholic people who are seeking a holy life in matrimony,” Colim said.
But first, they needed to tackle the legal logistics of an international relationship. Helen applied for a visa in April 2016 to visit Colim, but it was denied. For a time, Helen said the two lost focus. That’s when they started praying daily together.
“I have a devotion to St. Therese of the Child Jesus, and I memorized a daily prayer to her. We started praying every morning (my time) when I woke up (night time for him). Our daily prayer brought us closer and made us stronger as a couple. It brought our relationship and faith to a higher level,” Helen said.
They spent the next Christmas together. During that trip, Colim asked Helen to marry him. “She said yes and now I am a man whose vocation in life is crystal clear. Helen is my vocation. And I am hers, always,” Colim said.
"Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay."
The two are preparing be married in Manila.
“As I am based in Ireland, and Helen continues to work in Manila, it has been somewhat of a challenge to organize our big day. However, we are in continuous contact and little by little we have made headway in preparing for our big day,” Colim said.
For now, they plan to start their lives together in Ireland. But Colim says he is open to living in the Philippines in the future.
“The sacrifice Helen is making for me in her willingness to leave her family and career behind in Philippines is a loving gesture which I truly appreciate. She will leave everything she knows and loves for me, so I will prepare our home in which, God willing, we can start our own family. Perhaps one day, I will reciprocate this loving gesture, and we can leave Ireland to live in the Philippines. As her future spouse, I want to be selfless for her as she is selfless for me,” Colim said.
They also have big plans to travel. “Helen and I have often talked about living a life where our adventure is to see all of Christendom’s holy sites,” Colim said, so that their marriage would become “one life-long pilgrimage to draw closer to God.”
Update: Colim and Helen just messaged us to let us know they are married! Congratulations to the newlyweds!
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