Their Profile Pictures Were Taken by the Same Photographer!
6
Mary: “I found Bob on CatholicMatch.”
Bob: “You were found by Bob!”
For Mary, 73, finding a husband was her full-time job.
After the passing of her first husband in 2019, Mary moved to northern Virginia to be closer to her children and grandchildren. A history teacher with a love for learning, Mary knew she wanted to remarry one day. Inspired by her adult children’s success in meeting their spouses online, Mary decided to try her hand at CatholicMatch.
While still in the midst of the pandemic, Mary reasoned that online dating was the best way to go about finding a husband. A good friend gave her some advice as she began, “Mary, finding a husband is a full-time job.”
Mary took that advice very seriously. As she puts it, to keep herself “occupied” during the Covid-19 shutdowns, she split her time between getting a degree in Irish studies from a university in Ireland, and finding a husband via CatholicMatch.
Bob, 78, had spent some time in the online dating world.
Also from northern Virginia, Bob had been looking for about three-and-a-half decades for a “specific Catholic woman.” In all honesty, he thought the “offerings were rather sparse” for quite some time. However, Bob’s persistence paid off when he finally came across Mary’s profile.
Bob messaged Mary on “D-Day,” June 6, 2021. This historically significant date got Mary-the-historian’s attention right away! Looking through Bob’s profile, Mary found it to be “remarkably written.” They seemed to have so much in common, even the fact that they both held law degrees but were no longer practicing lawyers. Mary responded thoughtfully to Bob’s message, and from there, the messages began flying back and forth.
Mary’s son helped with their first video chat!
After a couple weeks of messaging, Bob asked Mary if she wanted to video chat for the first time. Mary just happened to be on a beach vacation with her son's family. Thankfully, her son was so supportive of her pursuit of a husband that he even set up the technology for the video chat!
After about five weeks of communicating, it was time for an in-person meeting. Bob hopped on the Metro line near his home and rode it all the way to the other end, where Mary picked him up. Her first impression when she saw Bob, who is 6’ 4”, was “wow, he’s a handsome guy!”
For their date, Bob wanted to take Mary somewhere cultural that she had never been to before, so they went to a Vietnamese shopping center. The two had a great time getting to know each other while exploring the shops and enjoying delicious Asian cuisine. They really hit it off on the first date, having much in common and feeling very comfortable together.
A proposal wasn’t too far around the corner!
Though their commute to see each other was about 60 miles, often through the unpleasant DC traffic, Mary and Bob soon became quite serious. Their respective families were supportive of the relationship, wanting them to be happy. Then after some months, Mary let Bob know she was ready to be engaged.
Bob was originally planning to propose on Valentine’s Day. Yet, since Mary suspected it was coming, he ended up popping the question a week earlier on Mary’s birthday over a romantic dinner!
Their wedding planning and marriage preparation was rather simple. Since they were older than most couples going through Pre Cana, Mary’s parish priest met with them privately a few times to help prepare them for marriage. They wanted to keep the wedding small, having just married off each of their kids in recent years at much larger weddings.
The wedding Mass was held at Mary’s parish and the reception at Mary’s house. They hired caterers and a serving staff for the reception, attended by family and friends. Yet, perhaps the most memorable part of the day was when Bob motioned for the waiter to come closer, and the waiter slipped and spilled an entire tray of champagne all over Bob’s suit! Talk about a toast!
“I don’t think we’d be married today except for our faith.”
The two spent a lovely honeymoon together exploring Saint Marys City, MD. They are growing daily in their married life together, citing their faith as a hallmark of their relationship. Daily prayers together and attending Mass are staples for them.
Mary and Bob’s success in finding one another on CatholicMatch offers great encouragement to others looking for love. Here is Mary and Bob's best advice to older singles and/or widows looking for their spouse online:
- Just like Mary’s friend told her at the start of her online dating journey, “this is a full-time job.” Finding a spouse, especially via online dating, has to be your #1 goal. Put in the time it takes if you want to see some good fruit.
- Get your appearance in shape, even for the sake of feeling young. If you feel young, you’ll feel more courageous to reach out to new people.
- Do a lot of messaging—take time to write out your response in a thoughtful way.
- Convey the best part of yourself, including very good photographs. Get some professional photographs taken of yourself to put on your profile. In fact, Mary and Bob later discovered that they both used the very same photographer for their profile photos!
- Read other people’s profiles and work hard on yours—it makes a big difference! Bob’s thoughtfully written profile is what prompted Mary most to respond to his first message.
- Pray, have patience and faith. Trust where God is leading you.