Dane had to wonder if his first trip to Costa Rica was going to work out.
After staying in a hostel and getting very little sleep due to the snoring man sharing his room, he met Ana for their first date in a location that was too loud for them to communicate very well. In spite of it all, Dane knew he had found his future spouse.
“I remember Ana’s smile as she turned from me to lead me to her car. It was so beautiful and captivating,” he recalls. Ana agrees, stating that she felt like she had just met her best friend and helper. It all started with CatholicMatch. Ana had found it difficult to find anyone locally that had a strong call to the sacrament of marriage, so she had been on and off CatholicMatch for three years. She prayed to Our Lady through the rosary, and when she received Dane’s message, she resubscribed for a month in order to communicate with this intriguing man. The photo of him with his daughters drew her in.
Dane started with a devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus, asking for the Lord to lead him.
CatholicMatch made sense since if marriage was the Lord’s will, he wanted to find a practicing Catholic woman with a great heart. Just as his six-month subscription was ending, he met Ana. “I told the Lord it was okay if marriage was not His will. It was literally at this point when Ana and I met. Lord’s will and his timetable!” Dane laughs. “When I saw her faith-filled profile and her beautiful picture, I thought...wow!” The couple communicated with each other for a month before Dane made that first trip. When Dane expressed doubts about their ability to discern marriage given how far apart they were, Ana had the answer. “Prayer, prayer, and prayer. Ana made sure we prayed continually throughout our long-distance relationship. She made sure that I knew the foundation for anything between us would be our shared prayer.”
Their second date going to Mass at Our Lady of Guadalupe Church went much better than the first date. Dane quickly realized how much Our Lady played a significant role in bringing this couple together. They knew they had something special, and Dane returned a number of times to Costa Rica, 3,300 miles from his home in Florida.
“Normally, I would arrive and would be very tired for three or four days. So, often, I have not been at my best, being tired, etc. Also, our time together was very expensive, given travel, hotel, food, and expenses,” Dane remembers. The distance wasn’t the only challenge Dane and Ana faced. There were family members who were not at first supportive of the relationship, English is a second language for Ana, and Dane had previously been married. Since that marriage took place outside the Catholic Church, an annulment was deemed unnecessary due to a “lack of form”, and the diocese’s marriage tribunal determined that Dane was free to marry again. There were also the frustrations that can accompany online dating.
“Nothing really replaces one on one, physical presence,” Ana comments.
“There were times, although we communicated regularly and often, it just was not enough. Sometimes we just needed to hug and could not.” Fast forward to Holy Saturday of 2019, when Dane and Ana and her son Mateo were on a Holy Week Encounter. Though Dane had planned for a more private proposal, Mateo didn’t take the hint and got to be included in what Ana refers to as “three proposals”. The first included the word “floreat”, which is Latin for blossoming. Dane indicated he and Ana would blossom together and create something beautiful. The second proposal had to do with their goal of getting to Heaven together by supporting each other along their faith journey.
“The final proposal was marriage, to be married sacramentally, so God would be our glue and see us through this life, to become, through His grace, holy,” explains Ana. Ana said yes to all of them!
They first planned a wedding in Florida but changed the location to Costa Rica when immigration issues came up. When they were unable to find a priest nearby, Ana’s mother contacted the local Catholic radio station for help and they were able to locate a deacon to marry them. They also had to find a church, and fortunately, the local parish allowed them to have the service at a high school chapel near Ana’s home. Ana designed the invitations to honor Our Lady of Guadalupe, who Dane and Ana credit with helping their relationship grow.
On December 29, 2019, Ana got ready for the wedding at her sister’s house.
Dane arrived without her knowledge and accidentally saw her. “I screamed and ran away!” Ana laughs. Dane cherishes the moment he saw Ana walk down the aisle with her father. “I was totally captivated by her beauty and that she really wanted to be unified with me as a married couple. It was a completely humbling moment and in terms of discernment, made our path towards marriage very whole.”
“Even with all the logistical challenges, like getting the church to accept our pre-cana documentation, even though it was completed in the U.S., we were married in a beautiful way,” says Ana. Now in their newly married status, they are working on finding a home for their family of five and creating new rituals and routines, including going to Mass and spending time together.
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