On New Year's Eve of 2020, Jolinda opened a drawer in Roland's house. She spied a small package wrapped in brown paper and tied with a bow. Jolinda pointed at the box and said to Ron, "Who's that for?"
Jolinda had noticed the little package—which looked like a ring box—earlier in October while changing the knobs on the drawer, but she didn't say anything. Knowing Ron, always a deliberate thinker, she thought maybe he planned to propose in December. However, Christmas came and went...
Jolinda allowed Ron to take the lead.
Jolinda, 49, from Huntington Beach, California, had been on CatholicMatch for a while, but it wasn't until she saw Ron's message that she decided to pay for a membership. They began messaging one another, and Jolinda felt like Ron, 60, from Florida, was something special. Uncharacteristically, she let him take the lead in the relationship.
"I told myself, 'You have to deal with this differently versus how you have dealt with relationships in the past," she shares.
For a change, it felt nice for Jolinda to be the one pursued rather than the other way around.
He didn't tell her about his work transfer right away...
Ron's employer transferred him to California near Jolinda, but he didn't tell her right away. Being cautious by nature, Ron acted carefully. They had been messaging and emailing for five weeks when he felt comfortable enough to give Jolinda his phone number. When they spoke on the phone, he finally told her about the move.
"I didn't know if she was crazy," he says laughingly.
Ron hadn't seen any red flags with Jolinda, so he felt comfortable sharing his phone number and letting her know he was moving.
Jolinda felt thrilled to hear his voice finally. She had teased him in her messages, saying, "I hope you don't sound like a girl!"
They were exact opposites!
Initially, Ron harbored one concern about Jolinda—he worried they were too different. They both had taken a personality test on CatholicMatch, and Jolinda's traits appeared on the opposite end of the spectrum.
"She's energetic and I am very quiet," he points out. "The test said that she would need to back off and I would need to speak up more for the relationship to work."
Jolinda adds, "I think it was a great suggestion, honestly, because if I had come full force with the way I am, he would have backed off completely."
They have both learned to work around each other personalities.
She fell for him right away!
On their first date, the couple went for coffee and attended Mass together. Jolinda appreciated how Ron took his faith seriously. She also liked that she didn't have to explain Catholic traditions and practices to him. Among many other things Ron liked about Jolinda, he felt attracted to the lovely grey streak in her long, curly hair. From the first moment she saw Ron's face, she knew he was the one for her. On the other hand, it would take him two years to determine if he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Jolinda.
Jolinda felt guided by the Holy Spirit to move slowly with Ron. "In the past, I've pushed it so fast. A lot of men are like, "Whoa," she says.
In previous romances, she would try to define the relationship as quickly as possible, but with Ron, she didn't want to derail their budding romance.
Finally, an "I love you."
A lot of Ron and Jolinda's relationships happened in and around the church. It seems fitting that one crucial milestone occurred in church before Mass. Ron had tried to muster up the courage to share his feelings with Jolinda for a few weeks. They were visiting a parish when he finally said those three important words.
"I was praying and kneeling next to her. And that's when I leaned over and said that I loved her," Ron shares.
Overcome, Jolinda began to cry. "I loved him already, but I wanted him to say it first. I told him that I loved him too."
That mysterious box wrapped in brown paper...
On New Year's Eve 2020, when Jolinda stumbled across the mysterious little box wrapped in brown paper, Ron figured he might as well propose. He had planned to pop the questions a few weeks later, but what did a few weeks more or less matter? He handed the box to her, and when she unwrapped it and saw the ring, Ron, who had a previous marriage annulled, said, "Will you marry me?"
Jolinda cried and cried, and they got into the car to get some barbeque. "She still hadn't said, 'yes,'" Ron recalls.
"In the middle of my crying, I told him 'yes,' she laughs. "There were a lot of tears and shock. I felt on cloud nine for hours. I'd never been engaged before."
Friends loved their wedding ceremony.
In 2022, at St. Anne's in Seal Beach, California—the same parish where they had their first date—the couple joined their lives in holy matrimony. When Jolinda—full Togan name: Malia Sosefo Fie'alu ki Hahake 'ae Tu'i Tonga Jolinda—walked up the aisle to meet Ron.
The priest told her, "Jolinda you look stunning."
Turning to Ron, "And Ron, you look stunned!"
"My brother came over with a handkerchief and dabbed the sweat off my head," he laughs.
The couple's friend told them their wedding was the best marriage ceremony they'd ever attended.
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