Patrick, 53, whose first marriage was annulled, knew he wanted to marry Janet shortly after meeting her in person. He felt that because CatholicMatch addressed the most pertinent questions on faith and morals in the profile section, all deal breakers had already been answered to his satisfaction. This, on top of Janet being a teacher like him, clinched it.
He was so sure about Janet, that he proposed after knowing her only a month!
Sure that Janet, 59, was the one, he popped the question, in November of 2005, after knowing her only a month.
For Janet, whose first marriage also ended in divorce, it took her more time to make up her mind. “I thought I needed to wait longer, but t
hen I didn’t have any good reason for waiting.”
Not long after the proposal, Janet was discussing her relationship and getting advice from her best friend when Patrick came to pick her up for a date. Her friend helped Janet to think clearly on the matter.
“I asked Patrick if the proposal was still valid,” she recalls.
Luckily, “He answered, ‘Yes!”
The funny thing was they already gotten the marriage license even though Janet previously wasn’t 100% sure. “A bit upside down to have the license before I gave a definite yes,” she laughs.
Why did they chose to join CatholicMatch?
Janet turned to CatholicMatch because she wasn’t successful in meeting eligible Catholic men in her parish even though she was quite involved in church activities. She was ready to find Mr. Right after having been single for 20 years, and she thought that CatholicMatch would have more marriage-minded gentlemen to chose from.
Janet added that she didn't want to live a selfish life. “My daughter [had gotten] married and living by myself was a recipe for a very ego-centered life.”
She had plans to retire in a couple of years, and she wanted to enjoy her newfound freedom with a spouse who enjoyed traveling.
Patrick was also looking to remarry, and like Janet, more traditional ways of meeting someone was not working for him. “We found online dating a better way to meet someone with similar interests and compatibility,” she shares.
For their first date, the couple met at Cracker Barrel. “He brought me one red rose, which I thought was very sweet,” Janet remembers fondly. “We had supper and talked for quite a while.”
Janet liked Patrick’s sense of humor and that he didn’t take himself too seriously. She also appreciated that they had a lot in common. Besides both of them being teachers nearing retirement, both of them wanted to travel, were dedicated Catholics, and they just happened to live close to each other.
“It didn’t hurt that he was quite handsome,” she shares. “Our differences meant more new opportunities to experience new things.”
Her family had doubts about dating online, until they met him in person.
Patrick’s two sons and four grandchildren were supportive from the beginning, but Janet’s family thought online dating was suspect and felt dubious about her meeting someone online.
“Since my family lived out of town, it took them longer since they were not around him much. They all came around, however, and have been accepting of him. Everyone saw how much joy Patrick brought to me, and they were happy for both of us.”
Patrick and Janet were married in a small ceremony on May 18, 2006. Both being keen to travel, they have taken a cruise together at least once a year since their marriage. "We have to Alaska, on two TransAtlantic cruises, and on two Panama Canal cruises, as well as numerous Caribbean cruises," Patrick says.
They've also traveled to hear Catholic speakers such as Father Michael Gaitley, in Tampa Florida and to a CatholicMatch conference.
After getting married 12 years ago, they've discovered a love of volunteering together.
Janet and Patrick not only enjoy traveling, they've discovered that they make a great team when it comes to volunteer and ministry work.
One of the first projects they worked on together was called Angel Food Ministry. "I was interested in beginning an Angel Food Ministry at my parish before I met Patrick but without Patrick’s help it probably never would have gotten started," she explains.
Janet shares that she was good at formulating ideas and organizing, but she wasn't good at executing the job. It turns out that Patrick is a doer.
"Together we began a successful program providing affordable food for anyone wanting to participate. Patrick would be up early in the morning once a month to travel an hour to pick up the food order. An hour-and-a-half later he would be back at the church [St. John the Evangelist Catholic Church in Hapeville, Georgia] delivering the orders."
Since that first project, they have been involved with others including working with The Lions Club and establishing a Divine Mercy Cenacle in their parish.
But not all of those years together have been easy.
In their twelve years of marriage, Patrick and Janet have gone through much. Janet has survived having breast cancer, and they have seen their daughter-in-law through a kidney transplant. They have each lost a parent, and one of Janet's daughters died from a long illness.
"We were there for each other," Janet share. "We now have three beautiful grandchildren ages eight, nine, and ten. We love sharing experiences with them."
Their advice to other CatholicMatch members: Go slow and trust.
To CatholicMatch members, they have a little advice: “Meet at neutral places until you feel confident to meet in private places. Go slow. Get to know each other. Also, have faith that God will make things happen correctly in His time. Who would have thought that at 53 and 59 years of age we would have found each other? We bless all those that made our meeting possible."
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