They met face-to-face for the first time at a coffee shop, and they couldn’t stop talking to each other.
“I can't really put into words the experience of our first date. It was amazing. It was like we were old friends who knew everything about one another, but we just hadn't seen each other in a long time. It was as though we were picking up the conversation where we left off years ago, yet we'd only just met,” Kristi said.
Just coffee turned into dinner
Mike agreed, “We went into Starbucks—we were supposed to just have coffee. Right from the outset, it
was like we knew each other. It just made sense to continue on with the date. There was this real desire—this pull—after the first date to keep getting to know her. It just felt right. Not to sound cliché, but it felt magical. It felt blessed.”
Kristi added, “Coffee turned into dinner, and we ended up closing the restaurant. I just felt so comfortable with him and we laughed and joked. We were serious and silly. We had a truly amazing, intellectual conversation. I'd never had that with anyone else, so I knew he was pretty special.”
Kristi’s first marriage had been annulled because of lack of form. Although she had been baptized Catholic, she had married outside of the Church. When she went to CatholicMatch, she was determined to find someone who was a faithful Catholic.
“I was super excited that he was involved in the Knights of Columbus as well as ACTS Retreats. I'm a Catholic Daughter and ACTS Sister, so I felt like we were pretty evenly matched in our church involvement, which was a huge plus,” Kristi said.
A love of service and Star Wars
ACTS (Adoration. Community. Theology. Service.) Missions is an evangelization retreat ministry founded in Texas. Both from the Dallas area, it is a ministry they continue to love serving in together. Mike works for the Knights of Columbus, another ministry that they both find extremely important. With those ministries and Kristi's involvement with the Catholic Daughters of the Americas, much of their time is devoted to the Church.
Along with serving togeth
er, Kristi and Mike, both in their thirties, have many things in common. “Mike and I enjoy talking to one another, having at-home movie nights on the couch, going to the movie theater, and cooking together.
"On one of our early dates, we had a gift card to Half-Price Books to spend. We just explored the store, each bought a novel, and then bought a Star Wars adult coloring book to share. We're definitely both nerds, from Star Wars to Harry Potter, to superheroes and actual documentaries. If we can do it, we pretty much enjoy doing it together,” Kristi said.
Mike always put Kristi's daughter first
“We both enjoy being outside. We enjoy wine and trying wines. And, although she's not a hobby, we love spending time with Kristi's six year old,” Mike said.
When Kristi introduced Mike to her daughter and saw how well he treated her, she knew that Mike was the one for her. She explained, “The thing that cinched it for me was how he is with my daughter. From the beginning, he put her first in all of his plans for our dates. He is always considerate of her, and they love one another. Once we introduced her in the picture, it just felt right. We were like puzzle pieces that fit together.”
She hadn't noticed the monitum before...
Although Kristi didn’t date until her annulment was final, it caught them both by surprise that
the annulment had a monitum attached to it. Kristi said, “I will say that we were blindsided completely by a monitum being placed on the decree. I didn't realize that there was, essentially, this hold on my freedom to marry.
“Basically, a monitum is just an extra step that you have to go through to help ensure that each party fully understands a sacramental marriage and what it entails. We met with a marriage counselor and answered some questions. Then he sent a report into the diocesan tribunal and they lifted it. It was handwritten on my decree of nullity, so I'd caution those with decrees of nullity to look closely.”
Her secret proposal dream became a reality!
Once the monitum was lifted they were free to marry! Kristi lovingly described the proposal: “The proposal was perfect. In my fantasizing late teens and early twenties, I'd always dreamed about being proposed to in a theater. I literally had dreams about it, but I never told Mike. Right after we met, I was cast in a production of Mary Poppins. He proposed on opening night.
"Mike went with me to the theater because he was going to be an usher that night. On the way, I played one of my YouTube playlists, featuring Billy Joel's "We Didn't Start the Fire" and "Love Shack" by the B-52s. We were jamming out while driving and having
a blast. Mike had planned on asking me the next day at breakfast with my daughter, but he said that he was having so much fun with me, he changed his mind and decided to ask me that night.
“When we got inside, I gave him a brief tour of the theater and showed him the box office before getting ready to go to the dressing rooms. The lobby of the box office also serves as an art gallery, so there was excellent gallery lighting around us. Before I left, he told me he had a question to ask me. I made some joke about that question having to do with having a glass of wine after the show.
“He said, ‘Not exactly . . .’ while simultaneously, pulling the ring box out of his pocket and opening it in one smooth motion. He held it just so the box office art gallery lights hit it, making it sparkle like nothing I'd ever seen before.
“I said, ‘Oh my gosh, it's so beautiful, can I try it on?’ in one run-on sentence before he even got the question out. He smiled and asked me to marry him while putting the ring on my finger and I said yes, without hesitation. We hugged and kissed, that awkward I'm-smiling-but-still-trying-to-kiss-you way, and then parted.
"I called out to him. When he turned back around, I held up my left hand and said, "I'm engaged!" Then I went backstage into the dressing rooms where I showed everyone. The props guy looked at the ring, analyzed it, and said, ‘Oh, I approve of this!’
“It was private, intimate, and perfect. I can't imagine a better proposal.”
Don't assume a profile is a whole person. Be ready to discover!
Kristi and Mike were wed in October of 2016. Having overcome the stresses of the monitum and the ups and downs of everyday life, they are happy to finally be married and sharing life as husband and wife.
In the beginning of 2016, Kristi had dreams that she was marrying someone but she couldn’t see his face. Her father then had a dream about her wedding and the groom told her that they met in that month—March. Kristi decided to take a leap of faith and joined CatholicMatch. Soon after joining, she met Mike. From then on their love has done nothing but grow.
Mike’s advice to everyone: “Don't romanticize or fantasize a version of the person you're talking or based on their profile. Don't allow the profile to box in who this person is. Don't assume there isn't anything else you need to know about them. Allow for there to be discovery. Discovery is one of the most fun parts. I think you can discover something new about someone every day, if you're open to it.”
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